Hope, Love and other Catastrophes

[Amelia Rotholz]

Letter to Peter

Amelia stretched lightly, as she was working on some design sketches for several hours, now. She turned, looking at the charcoal drawing of her beloved family. It was about time, to get a frame for it. A light wave of homesickness crawled up on her and so she took her quill and a parchment, beginning to write.

Beloved brother,

it has been a while, since my last letter, and I hope, I did not worry you too much, but a lot has happened. A lot of awful things, to be honest, but also some wonders. The situation with Gray grew dire, day by day. He and his minions, Valherian included, took the Necktie in and slaughtered poor Horace, one of the druids, showing of his remains as a sign of warning.

It was Inara’s prayer to the Five that brought eternal peace to his soul, for as she head plead to them, Bràgon’s holy flame burned for several days, unable to be extinguished, then his ashes were washed to the earth, due to Tanora’s mercy and finally welcomed by Ushara’s embrace, while Findari’s warm breeze carried his hat to the hands of Yridia as a memento for his friends and family.

I did not know him personally, yet I’m shocked by the brutal cruelty, he must have suffered. Times are dark and frightful since his cruel death, more than ever. But this clear sign of the creators gleamed like a beacon of hope throughout all the lands. However, there was a funeral held, to give his soul a last home to rest.
Oh, how much I miss you! And how much I miss home! But I can’t leave here. Just because it is like oz is. I am needed here, not only as a medico. I hope I can help the others, trying to bring some hope, laughter and smile. Also, I’m deeply worried for my dear friend Cynthia. Jacob is gone for months, without any sign of live, and she is a mere shadow of herself. I hope he is alright and Sirani may guide and protect him, bring him back save.

Which hurtfully reminds me of my own heart. You were so right about him, Peter. He was so cold when I ended up in hospital again. No worries, I have fully recovered by now. But after a horrible incident at the Temple of the Five, which I don’t want to recall here, he cast away my love and affection and shattered my heart to pieces, chasing me off. It hurts so much, I wanted to pack my belongings, and run home, immediately! It is hard to walk around Galmair with memories lurking everywhere, but I decided to stay and be strong for now, or at least to try, not least for Aly, Inara and Lady Eleanor talking it out of me. Also for Clairette and Azure, of whom I will tell you more, next time. Era and Oxi have my back, giving me comfort and support as well. I hope you don’t mind, but I must confess, they feel like a kind of family to me, too. Though, I will always cherish our beloved parents, of course!

That shall be the end of my letter, as work is calling again. I hope you are well and safe and my beloved home recovers with the help of Inara’s … friends? Please give my regards to all our friends and neighbours. I will write again, soon.
May Sirani bless and protect you!

Love,
~ Ami

Someone has knocked at the door and she folded the letter, setting it aside to send it off later.

“Who’s there…?”

[Amelia Rotholz]

Reflections – Part 6

Amelia sorted her depot out, searching for the book about the gods, she was sure to have given to Clairette.

Clairette.

She chuckled, remembering their very first encounter. The young elven girl showed up out of nowhere, probably teleported be the arcane gibberish, written on the parchment, she had in hands. Ami fond her at the market, confused, scare and blinded by the bright sun.
The dark skinned elfess drew her dagger, holding it pointing out to her, as she approached her in her casually warm and friendly manner. Both where standing there, afraid of each other, until Bidukan stood in between, demanding her to drop the weapon. Never before, Ami had seen a dark-skinned elf with pure white hair and eyes. She was curious and scared alike.

Back in that days, Clairette was commanding and hissing on everyone around her, obviously, humans and other races, except elves, where worth much less where she came from. Also, she seemed to be scared of everything, always waiting to get trapped or assassinated. She did not accept any food or drink, that was not tested by someone else, right before her eyes. A habit, she still holds up. As well as her all so proud and noble masquerade.

Amelia giggled.

It was always amusing to see her struggle to uphold it, what made her so much more approachable and somewhat cute. But back then, Clairette was the first one, that really put her nearly endless patience to the test. She eventually became page to Bidukan, probably to gain protection. But there, the drama - or comedy? - was about to start. Either was Clairette used to take orders, even less from a man, nor did she ever do any work in her live, before, obviously. She seemed to be clumsy and unwilling to do hard work, at first. She even refused to wash her own cloths. Having it hard, seeing something in the daylight, did not make it any better.

Trying to bake ended within disaster, as Clairette reached into the hot oven for the peel she had tossed in. Fighting, gem cutting and smithing also didn’t end pretty well. But farming seemed to have pleased her, even if she was trying to hide it. Of course, it did not go without hissing and complaining about the menial task!

That all was weeks, even months ago, now. Since then, Clairette has changed a lot. Well, she still mistrusts nearly all and still tricks people to try her food, but she accepted equality to those around her and was willing to learn, most of the time. Yet, she was still easily offended by cultural misunderstandings and often sought confrontation.

Her time as Bidukan’s page was over. Aswe talked it out of her, what made him pretty upset. Meanwhile, they agreed to keep her true origins secret, for the better of her security and tell everyone, she would suffer from star skin disease. Amilia doubted, anyone would really buy it, especially elves. But it seemed to avoid unpleasant comments and questions.

Clairette agreed to work as a huntress for her. Admitted, it was a trick to be able to help her starting a life on her own, as she would never have accepted direct help, due to her pride. Also, she connected with Sarangerel, obviously casting her racial bias aside and admiring her as a shaman. Looked like Sarangerel was taking mentorship for the young underground-elfess and Clairette improved fast, with culture and magical talent.

Amelia was happy to see her forge other bonds and by now, she wished to be friends with Clairette. She really grew to like her. With a smile she remembered the scene in the bathroom, were she allowed her to braid her hair and give her a new dress. It was so lovely to observe her, watching herself in the mirror, like a little girl, being a princess for one day. It was after that day, their relationship changed greatly. Clairette opened a bit more, talking to her about feeling homesick and lost and Ami did her best to encourage and comfort her. Clairette on her side, showed concern for her, even comforting her. She started protecting her out of own will as told Amelia, she hated to see her sad. Ami even overheard her, speaking up to Aswe, she would not tolerate her speaking mean to Amelia.

Finally finding the book, she headed to the hospital, to bring it to her new friend…

[Peter Rotholz]

It was deep in the night. The oil lamp did cast shadows on the wall in the quiet room.
Only the scratchily noise from a quill over parchment was to hear.

Dear Amelia,

bad news, a lot of bad news, indeed.
I knew already about the murder of Horace. Cay and I did write each other - and this man was the reason
she denied my love. I invited her to visit Brimshire to find peace.
Yes I admitt - I still love her. But I also wont bother her with it. What I want is, that she may find some rest and can mourn about her lost love.

Now she is missed - we searching for the shipwrecked with a bigger fisher boat, a fisher map and the help of Inara's "friends".
The first try was inefficacious and we had to sail back about the fog and darkness.
But I know in my heart she lives ! I wont lose my courage - I'll find her.

I miss you, too dear sister. The fate of Jacob is also unfortunate news - he is quite the warrior. Good thing that girl has you on her side.
But this knight ... yes, I wish I could come and put my fist in his face, break his nose and let it bleed for what he has done to you.

I will pray to the gods for you, Galmair, and the ones now close to you. Please pray for Cay sister !

May the Five watch over you
~Peter~

The quill did fall aside as the man in the quiet room put exhausted his head on the table, simply dozing off with a light snore ...

[Amelia Rotholz]

First Kiss

Amelia woke in the middle of the night, feeling surprisingly warm. She gazed to the side, blushing lightly as she realized, Azure was laying next to her, having covered her with his cloak instead. Her gaze wandered to the velar starry sky as her thoughts start traveling back.

Azure. It was way before Bidukan breaking up with her, when she first met him. That tall, seemingly rough-edged guy with a macabre sense of humour. They talked bluntly about daily things and chit chat. He was a returner, after a very long time, with a way dark history, of which he did not make a secret. It was during one of these talks, she learned he once was married and was father to a girl. Just five years younger, than her. He sought to amend for his former doings and start anew, so she offered him to work for her as a farmer, to give him a start.

Back then, she was sure, to find her luck with Bidukan, just once the dark times would be over. Even though he had changed again, being more rough and cold. Yet, she was glad, Azure granted her his trust as a friend, which was a rare gift, since he does not trust anyone easily.

Oh, how little did she know…

It was after the breakup with Bidukan, when Bidukan challenged Azure to a duel, after they had an argue about on what happened at the temple and how Bidukan was treating her. It was a duel demanded to death and Azure was about to lose his inner fight against his raising rage. Luckily, Sir S’rrt K’shire came in time to stop the madness and thus, Amelia’s begging calls, not to fight reached at least one of them. Azure.

Besides Inara, Aly, Eleanor and Clairette, he was one of those who kept her from running home, saying he would need her light. Same, as Eleanor said, that day. From there on out, started to become a hold for her. Supporting and comforting her, he was around her like a guardian angel. And so, eventually, he was to save her when she nearly fell of the battlement. He caught her hand just in time and pulled her back in. Loosing balance, she had fallen into his arms, keeping in his embrace longer, than would have been needed, still slightly shocked, but also confused, that it felt good. Even more when he took her hand, giving it a light kiss.

"I will always catch you.”

There, it all began. That night, she felt confused and guilty alike. The memories of her times with Bidukan still hurt, but also, there was a warmth spreading in her heart again and the curse of her broken heart was lifted, when he confessed to her, a few days later. She was confused and happy at the same time, for her feelings overwhelmed her and yet, it felt different compared to the times with Bidukan. Azure was kind and gentle, always trying to make her smile.

And now, there was this beautiful day in the woods. A picknick, full of talk and laughter. Playing a trivial question game of honesty, they learned a lot about each other. Over time, the questions got more and more personal and when she closed her eyes for a short moment to sort her thought and feelings…

He leaned in, kissing her gently. It was the very first kiss in her life. He barely touched her lips but yet, her heart made a jump as it wanted to hop off her chest. It was a moment of pure happiness.

Still blushing at the mere thought, she closed her eyes again, falling asleep again.

[Amelia Rotholz]

Temran – Part one

It was a busy evening in Cadomyr. Amelia, Azure and Inara were hard working on orders or to prepare for the crafting fair, meeting occasionally at the depot. Inara had given her dragon amulet to Leland as a token of luck, like Ami did once with her late mother’s necklace to Bidukan. She sighed, as her fingertips gently touch the old amulet, accidently pulling on the necklace of her own dragon amulet, slipping it out from under her tunic. With a smile, she continued her work at the loom, the weaving shuttle moving in a continues rhythm, as her thoughts travel back to her short trip to Inara’s home.

Temran.

It was a place like drawn from a dreamily painting, surrounded by deep, emerald green woods, mountains shielding to the north, the vast crop fields separated from the wall by a small, crystal clear river in the west. To call it a village would have been an underestimation. Despite the wall surrounding the whole town, it was an open and peaceful place. Crafters and traders filled a busy marketplace with talk and laughter. The overall architecture was typically human, structures from clay bricks and wood, but with the elements of elven artisan craft, like beautifully carved windows and doorframes. A mirror of the mixed cultures of people living here. One building even seemed to have grown right within a tree. It was the house of healers and druids.

Amelia was baffled and overwhelmed by all the impressions. Never before, she has seen such a place. Sure, Inara told her a few things, but she would have never imagined. That did not change as they ended up in front of one of the few larger houses. Before Inara could say a word, she was jump-hugged by a girl with flaming red hair. That must have been Selena, Inara’s best friend and daughter to the woman called Ylara. Inara often spoke of her. Shy and humbled as she was, Amelia stood back, but Selena didn’t spare her with a tight hug as well.

“You must be Amelia, then. Be welcome and please feel at home.”

It was the soft voice of a white-haired elf, who was softly hugged then by Inara, introducing him as her father, Jeruno. Not even having entered the house completely, they were halt again. This time, it was a blond, humble woman, wearing a blue dress. She smiled warm-hearted as she bowed to Inara. Sira, a girl serving the family out of free will, as she learned later.

It took them until dinner, showing Amelia the house and settle down in Inara's room. It was then, when Inara learned her grandmother was there as well. Lhira. So, Amelia was left with Lacy. Lacy, the legend she heard so much about from the survivors of the sunken Island. Needless to say, she was nervous and surprised alike. Like every so-called living legend, she was refreshingly human and smaller, than she had expected. But still, she was an impressive personality and Amelia could tell, she must have seen a lot and was suffering deeply, by a look into her eyes.

Later, they all sat together, talking. Lhira took her time, talking to Amelia. She was quite skilled, drawing answers without really asking. It was about the gods, her believes, but also about her thoughts of justice, redemption, and her ways to judging people. Amelia made clear her ways with Sirani, trying to spread hope and strength. The path of second chances, trying to judge not by one’s past but by present deeds and the true will to amend and better yourself day by day. Without even knowing, it was her words, making Lacy relax a little.
After a while, Lhira nodded with a smile.

“I heard enough. Inara choose her friend wisely.”

To Inara’s and Lacy’s surprise, she was offering her an amulet, bearing the family crest: a dragon, winding around a tree as if protecting it.

“She already speaks of you as being her sister. And after all, I’ve heard, I see no reason, not to do the same.
From now on out until forever, you are part of this family and under my protection”

The loom stopped its rhythm, as she ran out of thread…

[Amelia Rotholz]

Temran – Part 2

Humming a sweet little melody, she kept the spinning wheel going, her thoughts traveling back to Temran, again.

Amelia was speechless, looking at the fine crafted amulet in her hands, especially as she learned about the royal lineage of this family, Lhira being the actual Queen to a far-away realm, named Ar-Sikar. It took her a few days to understand the whole meaning for her. She now was rightful member of a royal family? It was hard to belief, but luckily, also supposed to stay a secret, for now.

Then, the celebrating part started. After all, it was Inara’s birthday, why they had all come here. First present was her fathers, who turned out to be a master at crafting bows. He presented her with a beautiful caved bow, the handle piece was decorated with stylized dragon wings, done from thin, translucent ivory. Followed by Lhira, presenting her an artfully crafted dragon dagger. It was obvious: the whole family seemed to be into that dragon thing somehow. Not such a surprise, her mother gifted her with an old, dragon shaped hair clasp, with a deep, personal meaning: It was the first gift, she got from her mother Lhira, back then.

Now, it was Amelia’s turn and she handed Inara a folded piece of cloth of dark, ruby red colour. As Inara unfolded it, it turned out to be a cloak bearing a knight’s crest, stitched in golden, shimmering silk: Bràgon’s flame behind the silhouette of a soaring dragon. Inara was out of words, what was a rare occasion, according to her mother. She jump-hugged Amelia, and the nearly fell over, laughing. The rest of the evening was filled with laughter, talk and music, as Lacy turned out to be angelic with the lute.

They spent 3 wonderful days in Temran, including Inara trying to teach Ami, how to ride a horse, with… average success, showing her the falcon’s of Jeruno and the 150 cm tall and detailed wooden dragon, they once carved as a father-daughter duo. Amelia really came to relax and leave her sorrow behind for a bit. Yet. she could not forget about Bidukan and the pain within her broken heart. But the place and its people left great impressions and she was already looking forward to come here again…

[Amelia Rotholz]

Entanglements

Azure and Amelia returned from a hard working day at Cadomyr, when finding a great commotion in front of the guard house, around a red haired woman, she had never seen, before.

“Sam? What are you doing here?”

Azure addressed her and Ami’s heart stopped for a beat. It was Samantha, his ex-wife and she seemed quite upset. She stepped back a little, lowering her gaze as the got into a heated discussion right away and from Samantha’s gaze to her direction, it was clear she was part of the subject. Oh, who she wished the ground would crack under her feet, swallowing her, at that moment.

But it was to become even worse. Suddenly, a man, Amelia did not know, shouted all over the place.

“Amelia and Azure are together!
And Samantha is under the weather!”

She winced, swallowing hard, to hold back tears. She felt embarrassed and weak and like being in the whole wrong place. Why did that guy do that, anyway? Eleanor reached for her hand, to get her away from the scene. But that strange guy followed them and called her a silly girl among other stuff, before Eleanor managed to send him off, just to bother Allesandra and Leon at the fireplace, who were not happy about him insulting Eleanor and Amelia.

As Eleanor had to go, Amelia gathered what was left from her courage and decided to face the situation. So, she returned to the guard house. The discussion had cooled off a little. Bidukan had observed it all with his typical cold gaze from the guard house door frame. Samantha and Azure agreed on moving the talk to the tavern and Amelia was supposed to come along. But before it could happen, that unpleasant guy from before came back in injured, followed by Leon. Looked like Leon decided to teach the trouble maker a lesson.

So, instead of talking all out with Samantha and Azure, Amelia found herself stuck, patching up the guy who insulted and embarrassed her, minutes ago. No wonder, she was not quite her usual friendly and calm self.

“Love kills."

Bidukan’s comment did not make easier, yet it made her think, distracting her. She shook the thought off, for now, doing her work professionally, but it lingered in the back of her head. Suddenly, they heard a scream. All went confuse, searching for its origin, but nothing was to be found. Was Galmair now being haunted on top of all? She shuttered at the thought and returned to the guard house for a private talk with Artimer, as he had requested. He was quite concerned about some matters, lately, and asked her about her estimation on some things.

When he left, she found herself alone with Bidukan, who was at the depot. He glanced at her, without a word, as she passed him hesitatingly, just to stop a few steps behind him, without turning, whispering softly.

“Bidukan... I wish you all the happiness in the world... I hope you will find, whatever your heart is searching for... I really do. Maybe you can wish me the same, one day. May Sirani embrace you always.”

“Why are you telling me this?”

“Because it is true. And because I... think I was not the only one suffering the past two months. All I ever wanted for you was to be happy. That did not change.”

“I really appreciated, but why now, at this moment?”

She glanced over her shoulder from the corner of her eyes.

“Because... at that moment at the bench, I realized... you maybe still might feel for me... And I know all too well how it feels... If I am wrong, please forgive me.”

Bidukan stared at her, then opened his mouth but finally didn't say a word, lowering the gaze to the ground.

“I don't know what to say.”

She turned to look at him with a soft gaze.

“I was ready to give you my all... to give up all my cause for your best and better... But now I realized... it would have never been enough.... to make you happy. That night there... it still lingers in every cruel detail.... It can't be taken back.”

She lowered her gaze, remembering, as Azure stepped in, probably to look for her.

“Hello.
Everything allright?”

“Everything is fine.”

“That’s good”

Azure smiled at her, keeping to wait for her at the door with arms folded. His gaze lingered on them as both, her and Bidukan, kept whispering for a short moment longer.

“Seems, you have to go, maybe.”

“You shattered my heart twice... But I'm still worrying for you... You will always have a light with me, if you allow. But please... Allow me to be happy.”

“Of course, you deserve it. And you will probably be happier away from me.
Now you can go.”

“May Sirani embrace you, Bidukan… and heal your heart.”

“Thank you, Be safe.”

Amelia felt somewhat relieved as she walked to the door, leaving with Azure.

“Did he bother you?”

“No, actually, it felt like he was giving me free.”

She did not know, how wrong she was…

[Samantha Stoneridge]

*In the quiet of the inn, a tired looking woman writes a pair of letters.*

*a young boy nibbles on cake, grinning widely as he rushes to Amelia with a letter.*

Dear Miss Amelia,

I am sorry that our first meeting was so filled with chaos and frustration. I truly do try to make a better impression most of the time. Sadly, I believe that coming here was a mistake. Galmair is a place of the past for me, and I should have left it there. The city is filled with painful memories, and now I have just added to them.

On the subject of mistakes, Azure mentioned that I should speak to you, because you’ve recently had your heart broken. I can assure you that I am a terrible source of love advice. I was around your age when I fell in love the first time. He was a charmer. Always knew just what to say in any situation, and he played me like a lute. I’ll spare you the details, but he turned out to be a cold, manipulative thief and murderer. I could not tear myself away though, young and naïve as I was. I thought I could “fix” him. The best thing he ever did was leaving me in the middle of the night, never to be seen again.

The second time I fell in love was nearly a decade later. I am sure Azure has told you his version of the story, and I will not disillusion you with mine. I will say that I will never regret our time together, because he gave me Phoenix. The beginning of our relationship was like a fairy tale. I thought I had found my happily ever after. But, the end of that relationship was less than magical.

I’ve not been involved with a man since. I’ve no idea why Azure thinks I would be qualified to advise anyone on matters of the heart. Mine was foolish and weak. I ignored every warning, every sign. I held on much longer than I should have, and likely hurt all parties involved more.

Azure swears he has changed, and the past few years have shown that to be true. I hope that he will continue on the path of clarity in his new life in Galmair. I wish him no ill will, not only because of our daughter, but because I truly care about him. You cannot have someone so closely involved in your life for almost two decades and not develop some sort of bond with them.

Azure has mentioned a plan to bring you to my home soon. I am going to respectfully ask that you do not. Not right away at least. I need time to talk to my daughter, to soften the blow that her father is not coming home as she’d hoped… just visiting.

I ask you to place yourself in her shoes. A fifteen year old girl. Your parents divorced when you were young. So young, in fact, that you have no clear memories of them actually being married. You do, however remember feelings of sadness and anger and a lot of trauma that gave you nightmares for a good chunk of your childhood. Your mother brushes off all questions of it with “It is the past, love. All that matters is the present, and that we love you.” But you know that whatever happened caused your mother to leave the place she called home and never look back.

Time moved on though, and your father re-appeared in your life. While he and your mother never became involved again, for all intents and purposes, you were a family. Your father did not live with you, but he lived near enough that you saw him every day, unless he was travelling. He ate meals at your house, and taught you all the things that drove your mother insane, and even tucked you in at night until you outgrew that. Aside from sleeping in different houses, it was pretty easy to see your parents as being just like everyone else’s.

Now, your father has returned to the place that your mother ran from. You don’t fully understand why, but you can see that it causes your mother and aunt to worry. You were holding out hope that he would find what he sought and come home, but now he returns with a woman. Even at fifteen, it is easy to see the finality in that. Your father will never return home, not truly. He may start a new life and family in this strange place you don’t remember. You’ll be replaced by another daughter, and it will become harder for him to visit. In the end, your biggest fear may come true…. He’ll forget you.

And I know it sounds dramatic, but isn’t everything dramatic when you are that age? Trying to find yourself whilst your parents add more rules and people begin expecting you to act more like an adult. I hope that we have provided her a solid enough foundation to build on, even if we failed miserably as a couple. I hope that she can stand strong and welcome you with open arms in whatever role you choose.

And no, Azure has not told me anything of the nature of your relationship. When you have known someone for the better part of two decades, you learn to read them a little. He is fond of you, and it is easy to see why. I am sure he was hoping you and I could become friends, and perhaps in another time and place, we might have. Unfortunately, I believe we will simply be amicable strangers who are bound together by the common desire to see a father and daughter thrive.

I wish you nothing but the best, and hope that when the time comes, my daughter will feel the same. Do not be offended if she still has a reaction that is less than enthusiastic. She is a spirited girl, who has been through a lot. She will come around.

Respectfully yours,
Samantha Stoneridge

[Amelia Rotholz]

Letter to Samantha

She is sitting in her flat, the fireplace spending warmth from behind her, making the shadows dance on the walls, along with the flickering oil lambs. In front of her lays an empty parchment, staring back at her for several minutes, by now. Again, she’s reading over Samantha’s letter with a sigh, before finally beginning to write, hesitatingly.

Dear miss Samantha,

I took some time to answer your letter, because I wanted to be sure to find the right words. I truly understand you and I was sceptic, to rush things and visit you and Phoenix so soon, to begin with. But Azure was quite enthusiastic, thinking you and Phoenix could not do other than like me right away. Well, I guess you know this side of him better than I do.

I can see the struggle, this is putting on you and I feel truly sorry for your girl. I would have been devasted, learning my father, may Cherga bless him, was not to return as promised, and all that because of a woman that could be my sister. The last I wanted, was to cause harm to someone, especially no one so dear and important to him. I will talk to him, to postpone that visit, if at all.

I know he says I am keeping him straight and narrow, though I can tell, it is also Phoenix, who does so, even more than me. But in fact, he is also saving me, healing my shattered heart. That much, I must confess. It is true. I was heartbroken, even twice, by the same man, in a row. Must seem pretty silly, I know. I was ready, to leave all behind and run back home. Many who are close and dear to me, tried to make me stay and they sure all have their share on the fact, I’m still here, in my beloved Galmair. But that very day, it was Azure’s plea, that stopped me from taking the ship, finally. Back then, we were just getting close friends, but he already relied on my help to keep control.

I want you to understand, I never really intended this entanglements and relationships. It just happened. I started feeling for him, without even noticing, in the beginning. But as a devoted follower of Sirani, I believe, that no encounter, now faint acquittance, no feeling occurs in vain. She’s guiding my heart and I trust her, still. If this is the way she was guiding me, who am I to question it? Yet, I never wanted to steal him away, nor as a part of your family and by all means, not as a father. I will never allow, anyone will replace you or phoenix within his heart. And I promise, I will be there for him, protecting him from the grasp of darkness, the best I can.

I hope, Phoenix will be able to forgive me, one day. I could not blame her, if she was holding a grudge. I really wish, you and me would have met under other circumstances. And yes, maybe we could have been friends, then. But I am aware, that this might never happen and I accept that. Nonetheless, I will pray for you both, if you allow.

May Sirani be with you and Phoenix, always,
~ Amelia Rotholz

She rests the quill in the ink well, carefully, reading over her words, before nodding to herself, trying to gather confidence. Slowly, the letter is folded and set aside. She will send it off, once her loyal sparrow hawk Taras would return from Exelous…

[Amelia Rotholz]

Prayer for Eleanor

With tears in her eyes, the young girl kneeled at the hospital bed in Runewick, holding the hand of the priestess, who was so dear to her, gently. Stroking some hair from her face, she whispered softly.

“Eleanor. Listen... I'm here, do you hear? I am with you... You don't have to walk the foggy path alone. Light is still guarding you within the darkness.”

Kaelyn had brought her here. She did talk to her about what happened to Drathe in the same way… About Jefferson and his minions… about it needed to end. It all turned foggy. Just one thought, dropped onto her mind, heavy as a rock.

“It should have been me... She always tried to stay neutral... if it wasn't for me... then…
… I’m so sorry!”

Amelia rested her forehead on the brim of the bed, while Kaelyn eased away quietly, to give her some privacy. Sobbing and under tears, she kept her gaze lowered, holding Eleanor’s hand, as she prayed with a trembling voice.

“Sirani, my beloved goddess!
Please, embrace her with your warmth.
Let her know she is needed and loved!
Guide her on her path so she finds her strength and will to heal, to live.
Carry her on the wings of a butterfly and plea for her to Cherga, on my behalf.
I do whatever you demand, just please, help her!
I beg you!”

She stood quiet for a few moments before wiping off her tears, resting Eleanor’s hand back onto her chest, gently, placing a firnis flower in it.

“I’ll come back, I promise”

With that words, she raised hesitatingly, sneaking out, just to look back as she closed the door.

[Amelia Rotholz]

Darius Kain

It was right when she returned to Galmair, as Amelia arrived at the teleporter, her thoughts still with Eleanor and what she just learned of what happened to her, her eyes widened in shock: Valherian and Gray, along with Marla, the wolf girl, right in front of the gate! She stumbled backwards, awaiting Valherian’s attack, but no arrow curt the air. She sought safety behind Leon immediately. But still nothing happened. They were just talking??! The whole situation was scurrile and surreal, as if sprung from one of her nightmares.

But still, nothing happened. Gray and Valherian talked about the new era again, forfaiting the gods and so on… their usual nonsense. Everyone stuck to Oxiana’s order, not to attack if not absolute necessary.

Then, a man appeared, she had met earlier, this day. He had introduced himself as a priest of Adron to her, but his name was Darius, as she learned now, since the others addressed to him that way. What happened then was more than irritating. Obviously, Gray and Darius were old friends, back in the days, when Gray was still alive. So, Gray invited him to follow for a drink together and – to everyone’s shock – Darius just walk up to Gray and went with them. Ami had begged him, not to go. In the name of all gods, she plead to him.

But he did not listen.

And the others? They just watched him leaving. No one blocked his way or tried to hold him back. Amelia was shocked and so the others seemed to be, because after a short moment of silence, they all rushed out to get Darius back. But it was too late, they already had vanished through a portal. Anger, frustration and sadness dwelled among them all. Even more, when Valherian appeared, scattering Darius’ belongings.

“Alas, Darius. Was a good fellow.”

With that words, he already vanished into the woods. Both, Azure and Amelia were just standing there, staring in shock. When Azure finally reacted, Valherian was long out of reach. Amelia though, went to gather the cloak, hat and goblet carefully. First, she was about to resign to sadness, but as she watched them closely, she took a deep breath.

“Listen. A cloak and a hat make no prove. And Valherian loves to play such tricks, just to spread shock and horror. I think, he might be still alive! We should not lose hope until proven otherwise…”

That was, what she said loud.
But silently, within her thoughts, she prayed for Darius, so he might not meet the same fate as Drathe and Eleanor...

[Amelia Rotholz]

Blessings

A few days had passed, since Gray’s ‘last visit’. Today, training was held on the fields and Amelia observed and drew some sketches, like always. But as Drathe changed into light leather armour, all burst with laughter as Bidukan mocked him jokingly.

“Wow Drathe looks sexy now.
Can I kiss you?”

That was it. Ami began to draw, what quickly turned out to be a cartoon, showing Bidukan trying to kiss Drathe , who tries to hold him off, with a shocked, widened gaze while Bidukan has hearts in his eyes. The drawing brought up fun and laughter for all and she left it to Drathe as a gift, once training was over.
Later that night, Drathe, Kaelyn, Clairette, Azure and Amelia, went to the tavern for some drinks and games. Truth or Dare. It was the first time, Amelia played this game, yet, they had mercy on her and it turned out to be great fun. When the couple left, Azure and Clairette agreed on another question game: Find the Lie. A game to see how well one can read another to separate truth from lies.

When Clairette retreated as well, Azure admitted to be close to starving, so Amelia suggested to cook him a meal. Entering the kitchen, she put on her apron, humming lightly as she began to prepare. Azure sat down as she invited him and watched her work. For some reason, the moment felt just perfect, like it was always meant to be that way. Ami dwelled in her role as a housewife, starting to sing while she was cooking some trout dish.

“In the morning when you rise
I bless the sun, I bless the skies
I bless your lips, I bless your eyes
My blessing goes with you

In the night time when you sleep
Oh, I bless you while a watch I keep
As you lie in slumber deep
My blessing goes with you

This is my prayer for you
There for you, ever true
Each every day for you
In everything you do

And when you come to me
And hold me close to you
I bless you
And you bless me too”

Later on, he finally took her to his secret place, he always wanted to show her. A small, magical, and beautiful island. They just talked, holding each other close in a wonderful, seemingly endless moment and soon, the subjects fell on signs of the gods.

“I have seen a couple but only three, that were a blessing.
It wasn’t ‘till recently, that I realized, the gods have been there, trying to save me, but back then, I was too arrogant.
The first sign was with Sam. I was on the way to meet with a fallen ones’ priest. After I met Sam, I betrayed him, but then I wanted his power to protect her.

The second one, when Dreadhart wiped my mind. It was Phoe that saved me from doing any more damage and from hurting Sam.

And the third was meeting you.
And this time, my eyes where open to accept their blessing.”

Her heart skipped a beat, making a jump in her chest at his words, as she was merely able to whisper his name and he leaned in for a faint, gentle kiss. They spent the night there, just gazing at the stars together, until they fell asleep.

[Amelia Rotholz]

Seclusion

A simple pure white dress, adulating her figure, her long, brown hair braided neatly, hold up by needles and with firnis flowers braided in, she looked nearly like a bride, kneeling before the fireplace in the flickering light of the oil lamps. Behind her, on the table, was her basket, containing the strict diet: bread rolls, fruits, water and some milk. All was prepared according to the strict rules of seclusion. Her door was locked and Eleanor would be the only person to reach her, her anchor to the outer world, in case, something went wrong. Amelia lowered her gaze humbly, placing a bouquet of 20 firnis flower on the ground before her

“Sirani, goddess of love and joy, keeper and protector of hearts. Here I come before you, not even able to plea for this at your shrine, for it would be too dangerous. I have not much to offer, besides the flowers you adore most, but myself, my heart and soul! I need your guidance and clarity. My heart is torn between two men, though I know their dark shades and circumstances. I can't understand how this is even possible... but I feel what I feel and I need to find out, what my heart truly longs for, where it belongs... be it Azure... Bidukan... or none of them…”

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀❀

Sunken in deep prayers, surrounded by firnis flowers, covering the ground, her thoughts dwelled in memories, circling around tiny bits, emerging from the depts of her mind, soul and heart. Pieces, words, pictures, feelings, all mixed in no particular order, drawing her down into a chaotic vortex.
The fist time, Bidukan held her close, she felt secure and save. In Azure’s arms, she did as well, but there was a warmth in his embrace, she did not know until then. Bidukan had risked his live so many times for her, and though most would not have believed, he had a gentle, vulnerable side, only showing to her, giving utmost trust. His kisses were full of yet unknown passion, feeling like burning her away in his arms, making her heart beat fast, like never before. But was that, what she longed for?
Azure on the other side was soft, tender and gentle, not pushing at all. She felt safe with him and his soft kiss filled her heart with warmth and tenderness. Yes, he also had his shadow lurking, a curse, he will ever have to bear. But since they found each other, he kept control, ready to endure all, just to make her happy. Memories, advices of friends and family… all they said, stormed at her, like a flood, that no one could stop, circling in her mind.

“He’s a monster”

“He is not a good man!”

“He’s not even fully human!”

“He has his own agenda”

“I will always protect you!”

“He is pure poison”

“He is a traitor”

“I will always catch you!”

“He’s a follower of Moshran!”

“You deserve better!”

“You are mine! There is no discussion!”

“He does not treat you with the respect you deserve”

“Don’t become a trophy!”

“I can change…”

“You are the best, that ever happened to me”

“Don’t fall for him!”

“I will fight to save you, protect you, but never claim you.”

“I just want you to be happy”
“I never want to see you sad”

“I love you, Amelia”
“I love you, Amelia”

“Sirani, please…!”

Then, she lost consciousness…

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀❀

She found herself on a wide plain; glittering butterflies were flying and soaring between foggy clouds, giving light, jingling sounds. There she sat on the grass, barefooted in her white dress. Far in the fog, she saw two silhouettes, a tall grown, dark demonic figure and a huge lion, walking with pride.
She could not move, but she felt no fear. As the silhouettes came closer, the demon turned into a bear, while the lion turned into a wolf. Then, both started running into her direction and she covered her eyes in uprising fear. Nothing happened. But she felt fur and a warm embrace. Opening her eyes again, the bear released her softly, while the wolf retreated showing teeth, turning into a snake. Fast, the snake attacked the bear, avoided her completely….

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀❀

She woke with a start, sweat on her face, her breath fast and heavy. She was lying in front of the fireplace on the flower-covered ground. She totally had lost track of time, but her provisions and the lamp oil were nearly empty, so it must have been at least 5 or 6 days. She softened her dress, fixing her hair. She knew what she had to do…

[Amelia Rotholz]

Letter to Peter

My beloved brother,

it has been so long, since our last letters. I hope you are safe and well. Here, I started preparations for Mas, to be ready in time, as I expect it to be very hard, this year. It has been a while, since Gray was last seen and it has certainly become rather quiet. But I expect it to be the calm before the storm. Gray kept us that busy, that we did kind of lost track of Letma, so I fear this might fall back on us now.

Nonetheless, I do my best to give people some fun and distraction. We had a wonderful Festival of Arts, with a great competition, showing so many talents! You would have enjoyed it! Also, the Festival of Gratitude was a huge success, though a bold thief stole all the food. Can you belief that?!

Anyway, there’s more I need to tell you. I found myself in a rather confusing situation. Remember, I mentioned Azure? Well, he took quite care of me, as I was shattered after the break up with Bidukan, giving me much comfort and support, without expecting or demanding anything. So, after a while, we got closer. I think I lost my heart again, but this time, it is hold dear and gentle and without conditions.

But this is where the trouble started. Bidukan came to me, wanting me back. He managed to reach me, until my heart was torn between the two. So, I did the only thing possible and went to seclusion, seeking Sirani’s advice and clarity… and she granted me a vision! Far silhouettes of a demon and a proud lion, coming to my direction. On their way, the demon turned into a bear, which I see stand for Azure, while the lion turned into a wolf – Bidukan. When they reached me, I was embraced by the bear in a protective, comforting way, but the wolf turned into a snake, attacking the bear, while sparing me. Why a demon, you may ask? Azure has a dark past, he shall tell you himself. But his eyes are honest, and he even endures Bidukan’s insults, mocking and even dire threads, never letting himself be provoked to fight. Although he could, but he promised me, not to fight him.

As you can imagine, Bidukan did not take it well, being turned down. Ever since, he walks a rather dark path, even accusing Azure to have cursed me with blood magic, to make me chose him. It hurts me, seeing him suffering, but slowly it hurts even more, seeing what he becomes. He left Galmair and went to Runewick, but his temper line is quite low. He even threatened Inara’s life, in front of me, for insulting him, as she called him a fanatic. Well, by now she gave him a nose bleed and Lady Katharina banned him from Cadomyr temporarily.

We can’t afford such inner conflicts, looking at Letma. Even more so, with Jacob still missing and also, Allesandra and Sir Exelous were not seen for quite a while, same goes for old Eli. I hope they are well. On a happy news note, I should let you know, Era gave birth to a healthy boy, named Ejder! He already mesmerizes the whole town! Maybe, they finally marry soon? Era was quite shocked, learning they would have lost their honour long ago, in Brimshire, having a family without marriage. A wedding would be so exciting!

Oh, Peter, I miss you so much! I hope you can come visit, some day! Not at least to get to know Azure, he waits for a chance to meet you. But I think, Cay would also be happy, after her visit went that bad. Family is the most precious treasure and I really miss you.

May the gods protect you and my beloved Brimshire and may Sirani always embrace you and enlighten your path!

Love,
~ Ami

[Peter Rotholz]

Peter sat at the desk in the farmhouse, Keona on the other side.
They had just finished the discussion about the protection measures for Mas.
Peter was satisfied - everything went well and this Mas they would - if everything was as always - hardly take any damage.
He was infinitely grateful for the help from Ar-Sikar.
The sturdy fences, the fighters, the healers - Brimshire had become a small bussiness center in the region.

"After Mas, I will probably travel to Illarion, for a few days, to visit Amelia.
I hardly dare to ask, but would you - would you all - stay a few more days ? "

Keona tilted her head with a serious expression. "I will ask the Regent, anyway some feel very comfortable here - they have already asked me to stay longer."
Peter smiled delightedly at the serious elven woman and nodded
"Let me know about the decision - and Keona ? "
Keona already had her hand on the door handle and looked back over her shoulder "Yes ?"

"Thank you for everything - for your help, but most of all - for your trust and friendship."
She inclined her head, and a tiny smile appeared on her lips as she left the room without further answer.

Peter took Amelia's letter and read it a third time before he started to reply.

"Beloved sister,

It was good to get a message from you again. We are also gearing up for Mas, but with the help of Keona and her troops it is so much easier.
We are well positioned already, the preparations have been almost completed.
I shall pray that it will not hit you as severely as you fear.

Bidukan - this name seems to be associated almost constantly with trouble and pain.
You did the only right thing - to go into a seclusion and allow the goddess to speak.
However, I am not comforted to hear that Azure has such a sinister past.

Therefore, after Mas, I will definitely come to Illarion, if the situation in Brimshire allows it.
It appears to be the case and Keona will ask the regent to stay a little longer.
Then I can put everything in her hands and travel to you without worrying, because I miss you too - my dear sister.
It's time to see you once again look into your eyes and embrace you.

If you see Cay - give her my regards . Will you ?

May the gods protect you and Galmair - no, all of Illarion.

With deep love
~Peter~

[Amelia Rotholz]

Trapped

“Let us ignite the fires, to welcome and enlighten the new year!”

Torches were tossed and the huge bonfire arose, engulfing all in a warm light. Cynthia began to play and people started dancing, chatting and enjoy the festival, while Amelia stood by the fire. But for some strange reason, the fire does not spend any warmth at all. She was shivering from freezing cold.

Then suddenly, all was drawn into a far distance, or was it her that was drawn away? The scene changed. She was running. The medico bag pulling heavily on her shoulder. What was she running from? She did not dare to look back, feeling the presence of the undead all around her. The harbour was not yet in sight and she knew, she would not make it there, as their numbers grew.

“Taras! Fly! Get help!”

More stumbling than running, she climbed a rocky path, higher and higher, while sending begging prayers from silent lips. She was catching for breath, pushing herself forward, without knowing, where to go or were she was.

Then she fell and was staring into the hidden entrance to a cave. Without giving it a second thought, she climbed in, searching her way deeper in as she heard the hordes outside. She pressed herself to the rough cave wall, shivering and shaking in terror.

“Oh gods, please! I beg you, help me!”

Her yelling voice echoed from the cave walls and suddenly pebbles and dust started falling, before a huge bolder sealed the entrance to the inner chamber, just in time. Sliding down the cave wall, she sank to the ground, hearing the undead on the other side, She was save, for now, whispering with a shaking voice.

“Thank you!”

She wakes with a start. Freezing darkness surrounds her. So, it wasn’t all a dream. How long has it been? She totally lost track of time. Her bag still holds some provisions, that was a good sign, wasn’t it?

“Sirani, my beloved goddess. I beg you for mercy. If this is my fate, I failed you. Please, let my loved ones and friends know, how much they mean to me. Don’t let this be the end, I beg you! I want to serve you, the best I can. Please don’t leave me in this darkness!”

Tears run down her cheek as she wraps her arms around her knees.

“Azure… Peter… Inara… Oxi… Eleanor... Please… help me… I’m here…”

[Amelia Rotholz]

Home, Safe Home?

“Amelia?!”

“Amelia!”

“Ami!”

“Here! I’m here!”

Then, the rocks came down and all became black.

She wakes with a start. Looking around in the dark room, her heart pounding as it wants to jump out of her chest. It takes her a few moments to orientate and separate reality from nightmare. She was safe, safe at her current home with Oxi and Era and her new family. She puts a hand on her chest to calm herself.

This was not what happened. Oxiana, Aly and Lady Katharina had found her just in time and brought her back safely, worn out and subcooled, but otherwise well. Her hands were bloody wounded from her attempts to free herself, but looking at the alternative, she had been on the lucky side. Yet, it was a shock to learn, she was trapped there for more than two weeks.

It has been some time now, but she still could not bring herself to sleep in her own flat. She tried the first days, but it felt like a bolder on her chest and as soon as the lamps burned down, there was this feeling of panic emerging within her. She even has problems to use the tunnels. Dark and small rooms give her the creeps ever since.

That Inara had to leave doesn’t make it easier. Amelia sent Taras to her with a short letter and a firnis flower to cheer her “sister” up a bit, since she knew, Inara was worried for her mother, assuring her, all was well and that she was looking forward until they meet again and her prayers were with her and her family.

What helped her a lot was Peter’s arrival. Oh, how much she missed him! She was so happy to have him around. Whenever they find time, they talk for hours and Amelia enjoys every minute of it. Unfortunately, Azure was still suffering from illness, but she did her best to get him on his feet again. Both men are eager to meet each other. A fact that makes her happy and nervous at the same time, but she’s full of hope for the best…

The first sunbeams break through the window, accompanied by the familiar call of a sparrow hawk. She wraps her cloak around her shoulders and sneaks out, not to wake someone. Finally, Taras was back and with him, a letter from Inara.

[Amelia Rotholz]

Brimshire

Lost in thoughts, her gaze wandered over the golden waves of grain, swaying in the wind, that played within her hair. It was a nice, sunny morning for a change, between the last stormy days. The rivulet purling along eased her thoughts and presented her with a moment of calmness. It would soon unite with Forkmyr River, which marked the current border to Albar. Brimshire and its fields and emerald woods were embedded in a wide vale between said river and the Middle Mountains. On clear days, when the north wind blows, you could taste the salt of the seas in the air and sometimes, the seagulls payed a visit. The village snuggles itself to the river shore.

Well, by now, Brimshire was not what she had left behind, anymore. It had evolved, from a collective of farmers, to an active, fortified settlement, holding much more than a few farms. The surrounding wall was made from the typical sand coloured stones of this area, giving a less constructing impression. Yet, she was quite impressed, stepping through the oak gates, the first time. The meeting place turned into a marketplace, paved with the same bright stone, the fountain had been renewed and even some craftsmen did settle down. Farmers from nearby villages come here to trade, now.

The small and helpless village she once left, had turned into the pounding heart of the area between towns Laris and Salkamar. And all thanks to the help from Ar Sikar. Elves could be seen everywhere, now. Not only warriors but all sorts of crafts, as well. And the way the people of Brimshire act towards them, could give the impression, it had always been this way. Well, with exceptions of course. Female elven warriors were still given odd, distancing gazes and the men clearly often refuse to listen to them and keep their daughters far from them.

Amelia herself had her own troubles. Now, being back here, she just realized how much she had changed. Peter had to call her down at some occasions, as she was not used to be silent anymore. Sure, when they were alone, the tune between them had changed, since Illarion. They joked and laughed a lot and had intense talks till late at night. But when in public, Ami sometimes struggled with the classic role of a “good girl” at times, talking back and such.

And then, there was Matt… Two days after they arrived, he showed up and asked to “set a date for the festivities”. It took Peter quite some patience and time, to make him understand, she was no longer promised to him, and even more patience with her, when Amelia interrupted to tell bluntly, her heart belonged to someone else.

Azure…

Her thoughts travelled back to him, her friends and family, and her beloved Galmair. Oh, how much she missed them all! Inara, Oxi, Era, Eleanor, Fergro, Clairette, Yridia… and so many more! Her stay already took longer than planned, much longer. She worried for the ones dear to her and oh, how she missed Azure’s embrace, his calming, deep voice. Or the long, deep talks with Oxi… the kids at the house and Era taunting her playfully for spoiling them. The long talks with Inara, out in the woods… Little Ejder… Lil… Yes, she missed her new home.

“Ami, do I get some breakfast, or do I have to starve?”

Peter’s voice brought her back. She waved to the young man, who gave her a playfully taunting gaze.
When she stepped inside, the wind started to arise again, bringing dark clouds from the sea.

[Keona Narsir]

Thoughts of a warrior

Brimshire....
A village became a city, a fortified town that provides protection. Which is now a center, the heart of a region.
For months now we have been here. Helped in the rebuilding. Helping to build protections against Mas and bandit attacks.
But it is more than that now. Many are thinking of staying here. To help, to protect and to live here. In Ar-Sikar, no one is
expecting them, and from that point of view, they still do their service in the spirit of Ar-Sikar.

However, living here is not that easy. The way of life is very different from what I know and live.
I am a warrior. I live for my God and Goddess. For my father and my mother. Brágon and Cherga.

But I will stay here. It is necessary until my queen calls me. To follow her call or those of my gods is my first priority.
Still, even I find some peace here, friendship. Conversations that have nothing to do with battle or war. And sometimes
also something to laugh.
I must admit that it is pleasant not to eat in barracks, surrounded by warriors, or to be alone in my house.
But, that doesn't necessarily change my ways.

Which brings us back to Brimshire. Things are usually different here. A woman in my position is still discomfortingly
unfamiliar to some. But I respect that. It's her way of life and there's nothing wrong with that. Even if the woman here
doesn't necessarily have that much to say, she is still protected as much as possible.

Certainly the influence through my female warriors is there. The young girls are partly fascinated by it, as probably are
some of the young men. Although the girls are advised not to stare at it or talk to it too much.
It is not easy but everyone does his best. Sure there are discussions sometimes. but they usually always end up peacefully.
We are here to help and not to make trouble.

Whereby, it can be, let's say, also exhausting. The talk, the whispering, is there and it's not like I don't notice it. But I thank
Cherga for the inner peace she gives me, I don't give a damn.

I get along more than well with Peter. I am often with him, we talk, have a meal together and discuss the necessities of the
city. It's casual conversation and yes, sometimes he can make me laugh. It is a kind of normality for me that I am not often
granted.

Now Amelia has also come back with Peter, at least for a visit. For her it also seems not to be easy to return to this life here,
well, to live. Often it happens to her that she takes the word or raises some objections. Something about which they laugh a
little behind closed doors, but also criticize her.
To give credit to the truth, I would agree with Amelia in many things. But to keep the peace, I rather keep silent. Still, she is
an impressive young woman. I can see why my queen made her an honorary member of the family.

Oh, and there's a farmer's daughter named Sarah. Some of the looks she gives me are... toxic. I guess she needs to work on
that murderous....if she can.

I do not give much to it and try to adapt myself so far that is possible for me. So I actually wear civilian clothes sometimes.
Or I do my training away from the city, like my daily prayers to Brágon and Cherga.

And for those it is now time again.

[Peter Rotholz]

Peter had gone alone into the nearby forest to cut wood.

With a grumble he realized that he missed Illarion.
He felt the same way as Amelia - it was not easy to completely settle back here.

She had really changed and some of the villagers had already spoken to him about it, that she was now rather rebellious and if he could not reprimand her.
He had replied each time that it was Amelia's business and that he was not her father.
He already knew, if he saw the glances, what was thought there *The old Rotholtz would turn in his grave*.

He wiped the sweat from his forehead and sat down on the fresh tree stump.
*It is possible that father would be furious, but mother would understand* he murmured to himself.
His thoughts drifted to Keona. She was reliable, proud, a role model for every warrior.
Even if he still thought of Cay from time to time, the pain that she would not accept his love slowly faded.
And silently he had to admit that Keona impressed him, that he loved to make her laugh and to dine with her.
The conversations were always deep, never superficial, and the decisions for the city had bore fruit.
Brimshire was now more than just a small insignificant dot on the map.
*This would make Father proud* he thought to himself.
In the end, that was also due to Keona and the helpers from Ar Sikar. Would he ever be able to repay that ?
Maybe he should invite the queen here one day?
Then he scolded himself for being a fool - Brimshire was still too dull, farmerly and would certainly not suit a queen like her.

With a small sigh he rose and went after his day's work in the forest - nobody should say he would have become lazy.

[Amelia Rotholz]

Paperwork

Tired, she looks up from a parchment, she was just correcting and rubs her neck. Who by the gods had written this this thing? Sometimes, she even felt like reading a foreign font or just a collection of letters between ink spots. Clearly not Oxiana’s doing. The parchment seems quite old. Correcting, translating and archiving some old parchments for the Don. It did sound like a common request, but was as far from it as Brimshire from Galmair.

It feels like Amelia was already sitting here for a small eternity and indeed, it had been months. Sure, Peter was paying her a visit, every now and then, making sure she would eat and sleep properly and see the sun before turning into a cave troll. She also visited Oxi’s and Era’s place sometimes, but mostly fell asleep right before the supper was served.

Nonetheless, she was happy to be back to her beloved Galmair. With a smile, she remembers the day of their return. Seeing Azure, she had to hold herself back, not to run right to him and fall around his neck, right in front of Peter. So, she took a breath, greeted and hugged him with a slight kiss on his cheek. All completely different with Inara, though: Both of them fell into the arms of the other, long missed sister. One of the best parts though, was surprising Clairette, hiding behind the corner, while Inara lured her in and Peter even imitating birds to cover them up. But Clairette smiled happily, and thinking to know her relatively well, Amelia was sure it was true, what made her even more happy. What followed was a good cup of tea, served by Inara and long talks. It was so good to see her love, her sister and her friends again and seeing Fergro, even just shortly, made her even more joyful. She was looking forward to see the others the upcoming days, but then: change of plans. There was this “urgent” request that could not wait any longer.

Really now? Some of these parchments look like they were older than the Don himself… Is this really an urgent task or just a way to keep her “safe” behind the walls for a while? She shakes her head. In the end, she has to do it, no matter the reason.

With a sigh, she looks at the stack of remaining parchments on her desk. She has to finish quickly. Mas is drawing near and needs preparation and it is also time, to finally get back to her normal duties as well. Naras and Chos lay ahead, normally both holding events, but she has doubts, if she could do it in time. And then, there were the books, she had ordered from Salkamar, which had finally arrived. To polish her skills for Mas, she will have to study hard. She won’t let the others down, not this time…

[Amelia Rotholz]

Pilgrimage

The sun had not even peaked over the horizon and all was illuminated by the faint silvery light, which divides the velvet dark night from the golden dawn of autumn, when two figures took the teleporter of Galmair in the protection of the morning fog. One was an armoured dwarf, wearing a two-bladed axe, the other a woman, wearing a blue dress and a white cloak, a basket in her hands.

Amelia was glad, she got an escort by the guard, a grim looking dwarf, quite single-worded, but reliable and competent. Her first waypoint this morning was in Runewick, or better Yewdale. She wanted to attend to Oldra’s shrine and thank for the exceptional harvest, she bestowed them back at the farm in Brimshire as well as plea to her to guide her hands during Mas again, so she could heal and save whoever would need it. After a prayer and an offering of her best pies, she also handed a bundle with fresh bread and some sweets to the priestess Eleanor Fairbanks, to give it to the children of Yewdale.

Next, the trip led to Cadomyr, to pay a short visit to the shrine of Zhambra. Again, her grim escort patiently waited at the entrance of the shrine, keeping an eye on everything. Along with her prayer, she did a small offering. She had given it a long thought, though. She did not offer anything military like, since it would be no more than an empty gesture. So, shields and the like were no option. The question was: What symbolizes her way to give protection to those dear to her? When she left, there was a small bundle, wrapped in clean bandages laying on the altar.

Silently, they left the safety of the town, heading towards the desert. By now, dawn was nearly over, fating into the blue sky. The last stop of the journey. This time, her guardian waited outside with the priest, while Amelia was kneeling before the altar of her Lady Sirani. Offering a bouquet of firnis flowers and a fine silk shawl, she kneeled down and lowered her gaze, praying in silence, taking her time. It was the dwarf, clearing his throat clearly audible, who reminded her, they did not have all day. Every hour out here meant a risk, sadly. So, she finished her prayer, bowing to the altar once more, before leaving.

It was about time to return to Galmair and have breakfast with Peter.

[Peter Rotholz]

Now he had been on Illarion and in Galmair for such a long time, but to meet Caynwyn seemed to require a miracle.
Mas was close - he urgently needed to go back to Brimshire.
He would help Amelia with the preparations, but then he had to see that everything was in order at home.

He could not always burden Keona with everything just because his little sister lived here in Illarion.
He felt slightly torn between the two places.
His father would scold him, because for him the family heritage was the only thing that should matter.

But Amelia had changed quite a bit in him.

Time to send a fast message to Keona and apologize !
Then a certain warmth rose in his cheeks - when he had seen that strange naked woman in Galmair yesterday, he had wished to see Keona.
He missed her. Time to go home.

[Keona Narsir]

Worries of a warrior

Mas....

The dark and bloody days are approaching. But, we are equipped, prepared. At least, I hope we are. Mas is never the same. But, we will stand firm.

Brágon gives us courage and strength. Cherga gives hope and inner peace.
So we will be steadfast. Always.

Still there is this feeling. A feeling, which tells me, that also this time a storm will come. I am not the only one who feels this way. But we will see. It is never sure if such a storm will really come to the location where you are staying.

And Brimshire itself? The inhabitants have faith. Trust in the gods and in us, their protectors. Even though there are some differences among us, we have taught some of the inhabitants to wield a weapon, in case of an emergency.

To pay respect to their way of life, only to the men. I also realize how important this is. It may not always be easy.
I have also instructed my warriors in this point to respond to the existing talents of the inhabitants. A sword would not be the right thing in the hands of a farmer. But there are enough other weapons that are also suitable for the movements that the men make every day anyway. Accordingly, for example, spears, better bows and arrows and heavy weapons such as hammers or clubs. Ar-sikar has helped out on that point, or even blacksmiths from the area.

I am also worried about Peter. Well - at first I may have been annoyed....for sure even. He has now, however, finally contacted me. He will be back before Mas. All this is quite close. Even if it is quiet at the moment. But, I know what to think of such silence and so do my warriors usually.

His letter and this..worry about him. But I also was smiling I think, as he apologized in his letter, several times.
He misses our conversations, he misses me?
I don't know what to make of that exactly but, admitting it to myself openly....

I miss that too, him too and maybe that is what makes my worry so deep.
He is a good friend....or even more?
Gods help me...

Brágon, my father. Cherga, my mother. Stand by us all in the coming Mas.

[Amelia Rotholz]

Mas

When she woke in total darkness, kneeling at the brim of the bed, panic crawled under her skin. It took her a moment to remember. This was just her old flat. With shaking hands, she hurried to light the lantern, taking a deep breath to calm herself, trying to banish the fear. Yet, being underground was more than enough to make her shiver.

Quickly, she checked for Oxiana’s breath and for signs of flashing fever, exhaling in relieve. His status did not change, at least it did not get worse. Yet, he even moaned in his sleep. All she could do was keeping the poison at bay, for now. With a sigh, she gently cooled his cheeks and forehead with moist cloth.

Her thoughts travelled back to the past night. Inara was the first, who came in wounded, sadly proof that the demon hound was real. Luckily, she was able to stop the bleeding and close the claw cuts. Next was Oxi. The poison did kick in fast. Bringing him to safety was a difficult task, impossible without Clairette’s help. He was suffering so badly. Amelia did all, she could imagine, trying to detox him, but only with average success, yet not being able, to determine the poison, not even with Clairette’s magic. Her thoughts were running in circles, and when she heard, that Inara had left the hospital and someone mentioned, Aly sending her home, she just snapped and barked at Aly. Although trying to apologize immediately, the damage was done. Probably, Aly did not even hear it, being worn out from battle. And as emotions cooked up, she did the worst she could have done, yelling out, Oxiana being poisoned and she could not help it. it felt like whole Illarion must have heard it.

She felt terrible, trying to apologize again, but the damage was done. Additionally, Titus was laying down with a poisoned cut, so she had to focus on that. Luckily, not such a hard task, but she was tired and exhausted. With Guir’s help, she was able to treat him, though, so he should be fine. Last on the list was Lady Katharina, obviously being under her lucky star, that night. Her wound was a really easy task, compared to the others. But Amelia was sure, there probably were more, who did not seek her out, but she prayed silently, the druids were save and could deal with it.

At least, Jefferson run off, like the coward he was! Yet, the battles had been fierce and draining, taking their toll from the fighters, both, in Runewick and Galmair. And Mas was yet not over. She closed the door behind herself, nodding to the guard in front of it. Time to check on her other patients at the hospital, again. She will keep watch all night…

[Amelia Rotholz]

Letter to Peter

It was late at night, but Amelia still failed to find some sleep. Too many things circled within her mind. Azure, who finally returned to her but was suffering greatly, Oxiana’s poisoning, Inara, who was still haunted by nightmares… And she did not hear anything from Peter, yet. So time to write a letter home. She sneaked out downstairs, took her seat at the table there and started writing.

My beloved brother,

First of all, I’m fine, so don’t worry! I’m sorry for taking that long to write you. I hope you, Keona and all the others are well and Brimshire went well through the dark days.
Here, it was exhausting. Each town was attacked without exception, this time. But fighters of all reams did stand together and so we were able to ward it off, every time. We had many wounded, but luckily, no one crossed the veil for eternal rest. Yet, Jefferson appeared again and Cadomyr is still under siege. There are cursed portals in the desert, which spit undead and red skeletons, constantly and we were not able to close them all, to this day. The fight took hard toll on everyone as we had to fight for what felt like forever. I must confess, I was impressed of the perseverance of the fighters.

But that’s not what concerned me most. Short before Mas, a grim dwarf appeared, claiming to be a wanderer. He told us stories of curses, demons and dark omens. Most did not take it seriously, but I was alerted and took the measure he spook of. Oh Peter, I wish I was wrong! It turned all out to be true: Our flour turned black, nearly all except for mine. We burned it to be save and it showed a deep violet flame! The Redhat, a demonic dwarf, which soaks his hat in the blood of corpses to maintain its life and power, was seen on the battlefield. And then there’s Ol’Scucca, an invisible demon hound, hunting for his dark master, marking doors and his victims. He got Inara, marked her with its claws. I was able to save her but the wounds were so deep and we all are afraid what might happen or what might come for her. She’s staying with me in Galmair, right now, haunted by nightmares. Oh, how I wish I could help her.

On top of that, Oxiana got poisoned during Mas. I was able to prevent the worst and he’s recovering well now, but we still have no clue who’s behind it. Azure also vanished during Mas and just returned, badly wounded. He fell for a trap of cultists and was tortured badly. Luckily, he could escape, but lost his right eye. Seeing him like this was a shock, Peter! He’s recovering in the hospital now, but I worry so much for him. He’s more sorry for me than for himself. I’m just glad he made it back alive.

But I don’t want to finish this letter with gloom. The Festival of Lights was a great success. All realms celebrating together and just enjoying, It was a wonderful night. And by now, all that were injured recovered well. Many send you their regards: Inara, Azure, Cynthia, Oxi, Clairette. O miss you, dear brother!

Sirani and Oldra may be with you!

Love,
~Ami

[Peter Rotholz]

Peter was busy, head over heels in love and almost forgot the letter he wanted to write for Amelia.
He took care of Keona, bought little delicacies, especially the stuffed honey cakes she liked so much.
Today was the day he was going to pick up the engagement ring.
He said goodbye to Lia and Keona to write the letter to Amelia first, when a messenger handed him a letter. Amelia's handwriting !
Hastily he unlocked the door and began to read, his expression became somber - this was more bad news than good.
He had to talk to Keona and ask her if she had ever heard of these creatures. And Oxiana poisoned? What was going on there?

So he began to write to at least relieve Ami's concern for him and Brimshire.

*Dearest sister,

this is a lot of bad news I had to read. I hope you find the one who poisoned Oxiana and - of course - that he recovers quickly.
I will ask Keona about these strange creatures, perhaps she has heard of them before.

Brimshire survived Mas just fine, but it was, well, pretty intense here too. Necromancers, dark paladins, undead dragons - and portals here too - not just undead that threatened us. Thanks to Keona and her warriors, we got through it all unscathed. But she was injured, a broken upper arm.
I was and still remain out of my mind with worries for her.
Which brings me to the really good news.
I will soon ask Keona to marry me. We love each other and want to try it together. And yes - we have kissed in public. Our vows to each other and that we mean serious about it.
My gratitude to Inara is great, I would never have met and fallen in love with Keona if she had not written to her grandmother asking for help with Brimshire.

As soon as there is news or something helpful about these creatures I will contact you again.

Keona sends her regards, as does her granddaughter Lia who saved my butt during Mas.

With love
~Peter~

[Amelia Rotholz]

Reflections – Part 7

Restless, Amelia stared at an imaginary point at the ceiling. The room was pitch dark and Lil, who was a full-grown hound by now, had curled at her feet on the bed. The room was pitch dark, but outside she could still hear someone hammering on the anvil in the workshop.

A lot has happened this year.

Jefferson, finally did fall after a long besiegement of Cadomyr, far beyond Mas. The earth swallowed him along with his unholy altar and ever since, neither Prea, nor one of his henchmen had been seen anymore. But was it really over. Nearly everyone doubted it and no one really wanted to celebrate this victory. She didn’t understand. Even if Jefferson would return or someone would take his place, a victory, so long fought for, should be celebrated in her eyes.

But yes, this victory had also a bitter taste.

Short before Mas, a dwarf had appeared in Galmair, telling horrific stories of dark legends. But soon it turned out, it was by far not for entertainment. Nearly all became true during Mas. And the worst of all was the demonic hound Ol’Scucca who had chosen Inara out of all as his target, nearly killing her while marking her with its claws.
And as Sarangerel wanted to examine the marking and sealed it in the process, the beast appeared, invisible but forbidding, searching for Inara and possibly marking Aly instead. Strange enough, no one else was hurt. Yet, she could still feel its breath in her neck, when she closes her eyes and it did scare them all to hell. Ever since, she collected every tiny bit of information she could get. But the deeper they all investigated, the more questions appeared. She would have given all, to free her beloved sister.

With a sigh, she turned to the side, facing the wall and pulled up her knees.

Time went on, past the Festival of Lights and the Country Fair. And as the year proceeded, more and more of her friends left, went on journeys, withdraw into distance or just vanished. She did miss them so badly. Fergro and his always joyful mood, Allesandra and her smile as bright as the sun, old Eli, Eleanor who she misses deeply, Sir Exelous and so many more.

On top, it felt like she somehow lost her bound with Clairette. She did not know why but it did hurt. Somehow, she felt, like her dear friend was distancing and facing even more trouble within her heart, than she told her. She worried deeply for her.

Lil came crawling up, snuggling against her. She caressed the soft fur in the dog’s neck and hid her face in the fur. If she was honest, she felt lonely in midst of her beloved ones. Azure was more away than present and even her birthday passed without anyone noticing, not even him. And to make it even more complicated, Bidukan openly declared to her, he would court her again. That again led to trouble with Oxiana. She felt like she did fail him again.

Sure, she was aware, that Bidukan was probably trying to manipulate her, yet she was not able to keep the distance she should, for some strange reason. But it angered her, Oxi seems to think, it was just to use her as a weapon against him and not because it was about herself. She knew, Bidukan was not good for her, probably shattering her again, sooner or later. Maybe it is true, what they say? Pure hearts are weak for bad guys? Bidukan touched feelings within her, she did not know before. It was frightening and thrilling at the same time. And so wrong…

But then, she thought of Azure again. His gentleness and pure love. The soft warmth of his embrace… Oh, how she missed him! She felt guilty, confused and torn. She prayed to Sirani daily. Begging for guidance, advice, or at least something. But nothing happened. Since before Mas, there was no sign, even one of her prayers was even heard, by none. On the other hand, what did she expect? She was nothing special, after all.

With a sad sigh, she closed her eyes. Tomorrow, she would take her ship to visit home, to Brimshire…

[Amelia Rotholz]

Brimshire – Part 2

It was a grey morning, the sun had yet not showed on the horizon, when she unhoarded the ship at the harbour of Falmarha. She found a friendly old man who was willing to take her along on his cart for most of the way, so she did not have to walk all too far. Again she read over the letter that reached her just before she was taking the ship.

Dear Amelia

I am sorry I have not been there. I have had to travel deep on this hunt as the game is hard to find. I miss you so much, that I have not been able to sleep. So, I sit here looking at the stars. I am afraid you are getting lonely. And I don’t want you to feel that way. I know you worry as well. But this will be my last hunt in a while. I hope me being gone has not been too hard on you. And when I return I will make it up to you. I understand if you are mad with me for taking another hunt just shortly after I returned to you. I do hope all is well and look forward to holding you close. I hope I have not pushed you away. As I couldn't live with myself, if I hurt you. I shall be home in a few days. Please take care of yourself.

Love always and forever,
Azure Lynch

“Azure…”

With a sigh, she carefully folded the letter, laying it to her heart once, before hiding it in her bag again. There, another letter, wrinkled and folded, as if read a few times, caught her attention again.

“My brother is going to be engaged… I hope she won’t hit him with a shield instead… Father would be happy… and confused with his choice…”

She chuckled and jumped off the cart, waving at the old man, thankfully. Yet, while walking, this heavy feeling of guild crawled on her again and for a short moment, her picture of Azure was switched with another man. She shook her head as if trying to get rid of the thought, fastening her steps. She would reach the farm before the sun would set.

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀❀

Amelia’s gaze was drifting within the flames of a huge bonfire. Of course, the engagement of Peter and Keona didn’t stay a secret and soon, the whole core of the town was celebrating with them on the gathering place around the fountain. It has been three days now, since she arrived from Illarion, but her thoughts still linger there with all her forbidden secrets. She was happy for Peter, but at the same time it fed the feeling of torn loneliness within her. Then, a bottle of juice was moving into her field of view.

“Smile for me, will you?”

It was Peter, holding out a bottle of her favourite juice. She chuckled, bringing up a smile for her beloved brother. After letting her take a sip, he knew now mercy and drew her up to the merry dance of the others. Soon, she was able find her laughter and did let go at least for that evening.
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀❀

The past days, she had been awfully clumsy, spilling milk and other things, running against chairs and tables, dropping stuff and so on. She wasn’t herself at all. Her mind kept circling around what happened in Runewick, confusing her so much, making her feel bitter, guilty and low. What had she done? Why? And why could she just not forget these feelings? It felt so thrilling and so wrong at the same time. Peter was trying to talk to her. But how could she tell him, what happened? He would be so disappointed in her! After a while, he stopped asking and withdrew a bit from her, spending also more time with Keona. Probably he accepted, she could yet not talk and was giving her time…

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀❀

After a while, Amelia was finally able to relax and ease her mind a little. She was taking long walks to the forest and fields, helping out in town as good as she could as a medico and spent quite some time, drawing or painting. The distance to Illarion did good on her. Yet, her mind was also with Inara and Clairette. Both had to bear their own, heavy burden right now and she felt as if there was nothing she could do to help. She did write another letter to the academy in Salkamar, but still, there was no answer. She just finished a painting of a wolf pack, resting in the shadow of the woods while some pups were playing among them. The day after tomorrow, her ship was waiting, to bring her back to Galmair…

[Peter Rotholz]

A falcon swoops over Galmair in search of someone.
When he spots Amelia, the falcon shrieks briefly and settles down near her to deliver a message.

*Dearest sister,

I hope this message finds you safe and sound.
I know you are waiting for Keona and me because of the wedding.
Our Mas was fierce - and Brimshire has suffered many casualties, but no fatalities.
Without Keona's troops we would have been truly lost.

Unfortunately, Keona is also among the severely injured -
I write here by candlelight, my beloved asleep, and I watch over her. The worst seems to be over, the healers assured me.

At the very end, when everything seemed to be over, she was ambushed by demonic beasts. She was overpowered and yes -
how shall I tell you - a part of her armor and erm-.... yes the beast literally bit a chunk out of her....
It was - by the five - I died a thousand deaths the last few days.
Almost bled to death, high fever and still she put her hand on my cheek and reassured all would be well.

Amelia - I almost wish she would never fight again....

But I digress. She is on the road to healing.Still, we'll have to postpone the wedding a bit until she's fully recovered.

I hope it was not as terrible for you as it was for us.
From my side, everything has already been initiated to rebuild the walls and everything that was damaged.
Brimshire has once again weathered a storm.

I send many greetings to Galmair
and hug you from afar.

~Peter~