Illarion.org

((english below please ))



Heute wurde mir von einem GM etwas nahe gelegt, was mich erschreckt und auch verletzt hat, aber vor allem: mich nachdenklich gestimmt. Deswegen verfasse ich hier diesen Post und deswegen möchte ich darüber reden.
So wie es aussieht gab es einige Beschwerden über mich im IRC Channel und darauf möchte ich gerne eingehen.
Um es kurz zu machen, denke ich dass ich es zu zwei Vorwürfen zusammenfassen kann:


1.) Ich stelle mich mit meinen Charakteren bei Quests immer in den Vordergrund und verdränge damit 'Newbies'.

2.) Ich bin 'elitär' und vergraule dadurch Spieler.


Diese Dinge wurden von mehreren Spielern heran getragen wurden und möchte mich dazu äußern. Da ich nicht weiß, wer diese Spieler sind, bleibt mir nichts anderes übrig als mich auf diese Weise rechtzufertig und meine Gedanken dazu zu äußern.



Zu 1.)

Ich habe gründlich über diesen Vorwurf nachgedacht. So gern ich eigentlich alles von mir abweisen würde, aber das kann ich schon alleine daher nicht, weil es nicht in meiner Natur liegt. Ich kann zwar traurig oder wütend sein, aber sobald die ersten Emotionen abgeklungen sind, frage ich mich, was ich falsch gemacht habe. Und versuche die Fehler an mir zu finden.
Daher muss ich diesem Vorwurf zu einem gewissen Ausmaß rechtgeben aber gleichzeitig fragen, wer nicht gerne seine Chars in Szene setzt. Mir wurde folgendes Zitat aus dem IRC gegeben:

"but Caitlin just *had* to hog the glory, or she would have caused a *huge* scene... so publicly"

Gut, ich weiß nicht von welchem Quest genau dort die Rede war. Ich möchte auch darauf hinweisen, dass der Char von dem hier wohl die Rede ist eine gewisse Ausnahme darstellt. Ich persönlich habe nicht das Gefühl, dass ich versuche bei jedem Quest in Mittelpunkt zu stehen oder anderen die Lorbeeren wegzunehmen. Natürlich versuche ich weitläufig auch meinen Spaß zu haben, aber verderbe ich wirklich anderen die Freude am Spiel? Und mache ich öffentlich Aufstände wenn ich nicht die Aufmersamkeit kriege die ich möchte?

Anscheinend muss daran wohl was dran sein, denn auch im ESQS bin ich wohl mehr oder minder 'verschmäht'.

"I've heard a few things, But just telling us ESQS people to not do quests JUST for your characters."

Ich möchte niemanden die Quests 'wegnehmen' , aber es ist auch schon passiert, dass ich versehentlich in ein Quest gestolpert bin und ich einfach meinem Char entsprechend gehandelt habe und ich denke das ist mir durchaus erlaubt. (Gwendolin und der Drache.) Genauso ist es schon vorgekommen, dass ich Quests weitläufig umgegangen und nicht daran teilnahm (Ich erinnere mich an Caitlin und Donal in der Taverne als alle anderen 20 Spieler einem Quest nachliefen und wir uns darüber lustig machten, aber das ist schon Urzeiten her.). Ich gehe nicht extra ingame wenn Quests angekündigt werden oder laufe zu bestimmten Locations nur weil ich weiß, dass dort was passieren wird. Wenn ich jedoch hineinstolpere und damit involviert werde, dann mache ich auch etwas drauß und handle meinem Charconcept entsprechend.

zu dem: "Ich verdränge damit Newbies", kann ich nur sagen, dass mir soetwas noch nicht aufgefallen wäre. Eigentlich bin ich die Art von Person, die versucht andere zu involvieren, aber entweder irre ich mich oder es wird anders aufgefasst als es ist.



2.)

Das hat mich ziemlich hart getroffen. Und Ich hab ein wenig nachforschen müssen um rauszufinden, dass es hauptsächlich um die Sache mit der Taverne ging. Aber erstmal möchte ich mich generell dazu äußern.
Ich würde mich nicht als 'elitär' bezeichnen. Ich rpe mit jedem der mir über den Weg läuft. Ich helfe jedem Newbie der mir über den Weg läuft und investiere Zeit und Geduld darin. Ich habe nie, kein einziges Mal, in keinem Thread, gesagt "Ich finde das RP von (soundso) schlecht." Ich habe Appelle geschrieben; ich habe geschrieben, wie ich mir vorstelle das manche Dinge besser sein könnten und meine Gedanken frei dazu geäußert. Aber ich habe nie über das RP irgendeines Spielers geschimpft oder gesagt, dass ich besser bin als dieser oder jener.

hab grad ein interessantes Gesprach im Chan mit Spielern.

Weisst du, worin alle übereinstimmen (xxxxx, xxxxx und so)?
dass PO Galim und Jen mehr oder weniger alle leute verschrecken.

Also, they look down their noses at anyone who doesn't RP perfectly... and to *their* expectations. Such as the tavern mess yesterday.

Also die Sache mit der Taverne die mir wohl diesen Ruf ganz besonders eingebracht hat. Als das ganze ingame gesschehen ist, blieb ich in charakter und hab meinen Char einfach still weitergespielt während alle schon anfingen sich ooc zu beschweren. Ich hingegen hab meinen Mund gehalten und einfach nur den Geschehenissen zugesehen. Es kam kein einziges Wort OOC von mir (außer als Gryphius mir etwas zuflüsterte) und selbst IC hat meinen Char nicht bei dieser 'Hetzaktion' mitgemacht.

Dann im Forum habe ich genau folgende Aussagen getätigt:
"Das Event depremierend war"
"Das ich traurig darüber bin, das es so gelaufen ist, weil Leute auf dieses Event hingearbeitet haben"
Dann war ich bestürzt darüber, dass das auf so viel Unverständnis hinauslief. Das einfach nicht verstanden wurde, warum einige Leute erzürnt/traurig darüber waren. Demnach sagte ich, "das ich hoffe, dass sie ihren Spaß auf Kosten der anderen hatten." - Es tut mir leid für den unnötigen Sarkasmus. Es war unangebracht und ich entschuldige mich dafür.
Weiters habe ich dann in Erinnerung gerufen, dass wir eine Community sind und das wir alle gemeinsam spielen und das wir versuchen sollten etwas Rücksicht zu zeigen. Das es in Ordnung geht, bei seinem Char-concept zu bleiben, aber wir trotzdem etwas nachdenklicher mit unserem Handeln umgehen sollten.
Zu guter letzt habe ich mich dann noch bei Maggie dafür entschuldigt (obwohl ich ja gar nichts dafür konnte?) das es so gelaufen ist, wie es lief und das die Fehler nicht nur auf einer Seite stattfanden, sondern, dass jeder Fehler machte. Und das war mein letzter Post in diesem Thread.


Was daran hat mich mich als 'elitär' abstempeln lassen? Ich habe weder jemanden zugestimmt, dass das RP von Person X schlecht war, noch habe sich selbiges verlauten lassen. Den einzigen Faux-Pas den ich mir geleistet habe, war der Post in dem ich meine Frustration durch Sarkasmus erkenntlich gemacht habe.


Ich habe das Gefühl, dass mein Name immer im selben Atemzug wie Patrics (PO Galim) genannt wird und ich frage mich wieso? Patric und ich sind Freunde, dass ist jedem bekannt. Aber ich bin nicht immer seiner Meinung (eigentlich sehr selten sogar.). Ich würde mir wünschen, dass die Leute mich nachdem beurteilen was *ich* wirklich sage und was *ich* wirklich tue und mich nicht in einen Topf mit irgendwem anders werfen.



Nun das wäre das was ich zu den beiden Vorwürfen sagen wollte. Ich habe versucht meine Sicht der Dinge zu äußern um eventuelle Missverständnisse zu klären. Mir wurde gesagt, dass diese Vorwürfe von Spielern kamen, die sagten, sie wären Freunde von mir. Ich möchte meine Freunde und auch jeden anderen daher bitten ruhig zu mir selbst zu treten wenn ich etwas gemacht habe, was nicht in Ordnung ist. Ich möchte nicht, dass man mir ins Gesicht lächelt und sagt es ist alles okay, obwohl dem nicht so ist.
Wenn ich Fehler mache, dann bitte sagt es mir. Ich möchte meine Fehler erkennen, ich möchte daraus lernen und ich möchte es dann besser machen. Das gilt für jeden in unserer Community. Wenn ich etwas getan habe, was euch missfiel, bitte schreibt mir eine PM und erklärt es mir. Ich bin ein Mensch und ich bin nicht perfekt, aber ich bin offen dafür meine Fehler einzusehen.

Im gleichen Zug möchte ich mich auch entschuldigen. Und zwar an jene, denen ich wohl auf die Füße getreten bin. Jene die ich wütend oder frustriert gemacht habe. Es war nicht mit Absicht und es tut mir leid und ich hoffe, dass mir auch verziehen wird.



Wichtig:

Und zu guter Schluss, noch eine Bitte. Es muss niemand hier auf diesen Thread antworten, aber wenn dem so ist, dann bitte flamed nicht. Weder mich, noch sonst irgendeinen anderen Spieler. Das gilt für alle. Dieser Thread ist nicht dazu da jemanden anzuschwärzen oder niederzumachen, sondern einzig und allein dafür, dass ich mich entschuldigen kann und die Bitte dass man an mich selbst herantritt, wenn etwas nicht stimmt. Ich möchte auch nicht, dass hier über Patric diskutiert wird, - denn ich bin so mal so egoistisch und beanspruche den Thread alleine für mich
Bitte, bitte lasst uns einmal freundlich und offen zueinander sein (smileys for peace!)




********************




Today a GM came to me and told me something that shocked me and hurted me, but above all: made me thoughtful. That's why I write this post and that's why I want to speak about it.
There were some complains about me in the IRC channel and I would like to dwell on it.
To make it short, I think, I can summarize it to following two reproaches:

1.) I try to be the center of every quests with my character and therewith I squeeze out 'newbies'

2.) I'm elitist and I scare away players.


Some players have approached with it and I want to tell my thoughts about it. Since I don' t know who those players are, there is no option left than to do it this way...


To 1.)

I've thought alot about this reproach. As much as I would like to reject it, I can't. Simply because it's not my nature. I can be sad or angry, but as soon as the first emotions fade I'm wondering what I've done wronga nd I try to figure out the mistakes I've done.
That is why I have to concede this point to a certain degree. But I also have to ask who doesn't try to bring his char in scene. I've been told following quote of the IRC :

"but Caitlin just *had* to hog the glory, or she would have caused a *huge* scene... so publicly"

Good... I don't know which quest has been spoken of. I want to remark though that the char has been spoken of is some kind of exception. I personally have this feeling, that I don't try to be the center of quests or that I excessive try to steal others the 'fame'. Of course I try to have some fun with my chars as well, but am I really ruining others joy at the game? And do I really whine publically if I don't get the attention I want to?

Apparently there some truth to it, because also in ESQS I'm more or less 'spurned'.

"I've heard a few things, But just telling us ESQS people to not do quests JUST for your characters."

I don't want to 'steal' anyones quest, but it happened to me that accidently stumbled into one and that I acted like my character would and I guess I'm allowed to do so. (Gwendonlin and the dragon.) It also already happened that avoided quests and didn't participate at all (I remember when Caitlin and Donal sat in tavern, when all the other 20 players ran after a quest and we joked about it, but that's ages ago.) I don't particulary go ingame because of an announced quest and neither run to certain locations because something is going to happen there. But when I stumble into quests and I get involved, I'm making something of it and act accordingly to my char concept.

to the "I squeeze out newbies" - part,.. I can only say that I didn't notice anything like that. Usually I'm the kind of person who tries to involve others, but either I'm terrible wrong or something got misinterpret.




2.) That really hitted me hard. And I've had to ask around a bit to find out that it was mostly because of the matter with the tavern. But first I want to advance generally. I would not call myself elitist..... I'm rping with everyone who comes across my way. I'm helping any newbie that comes across my way and I spent time and patience in it. I've never ever, in no single thread, said: " X does bad rp". I wrote appeals. I've told about how I see things and how they may could've been better and explained my thoughts. But I've never judged about *any* players RP or insulted anyone or implied that I'm better than X.

I have an interesting talk in the channel with players.

You know what they all agree upon?
That PO Galim and Jen scare away people.

Also, they look down their noses at anyone who doesn't RP perfectly... and to *their* expectations. Such as the tavern mess yesterday

.


So... I guess the matter with the tavern has especially given me this reputation. As the whole thing happened ingame, I stayed in character the whole time over and only played quietly along, while all the others started to speak or complain in ooc. I instead said nothing and just watched the happenings and roleplayed along. There was no single word ooc from my part (apart from something that Gryphius whispered to me) nor did my char IC participate at the 'chevy'.

Afterwards at the forum I said following things:
"That the event was depressing"
"That I'm sad about it ended up, because people worked for it"
Then I was shocked/upset about how many didn't show understanding. That it wasn't understood that some people are sad/angry about the happening. According to that I said 'I hope you have fun on the costs of others' - and I'm sorry for that unnecessary sarcasm. That comment was unasked for and I apologize for it.
Further on I tried to remind people that we are a community and that we play together and that we should try to show some consideration. That is totally okay if you stick to your char concept but that we could all be a little bit more thoughtfully with our actions.
And at last I apologized to Maggie (for something that wasn't my doing?) that it ended up the way it did and that the faults weren't only on 'one side' but that everyone did mistakes. And that was my last post for this thread.


What about it made me elitist? I've neither agreed on that the RP of person X was bad, nor I've said anyhting similar. The only faux pas I made was that I showed my frustration through sarcasm.


I have this feeling that my name is always mentioned in the same exhalation with Patrics (PO Galim) and I wonder why? Patric and I are friends, everyone knows that. But I don't always share his opinion (actually quite seldom.) I would wish that people would judge me about what *I* really do and what *I* really say and not to lump me together with someone else.



okay... that was what I wanted to say to the those two reproaches. I tried to explain the things form my view to carify possible misunderstandings. I've been told that those reproaches were from players, who said, they would be friends of mine. That's why I want to tell my friends and everyone else here that you can come to me yourself if I've done something wrong. I don't want to be smiled at and been told that is is okay, when I've done something that wasn't.
When I do mistakes, please tell me. I want to know them, I want to learn from them and then I want to do it better. That applies for everyone in our community. If I've done something wrong, please write me a pm and clarify it with me. I'm a human and I'm not perfect, but I'm ready to accept my mistakes and to think over it.

Along with that I also want to apologize. To all who I've may upset or frustrated or made angry. It wasn't with intention and I'm sorry and I hope you will accept my apologize.


One thing more to add: I want to remark that I'm still not native english. I write a lot in english, I play a lot in english, but it's still a foreign language to me and it frequently happens that I can't express myself the way I want to. I'm afraid that it is also the language barrier that mades me appear... unfriendly?
I'm not at all, and I'm sorry if misunderstandings occur due to my rather horrible english skills...




Important:

At last I want to ask for something. No one has to reply ot this thread, but if you want to, please don't flame. Neither me nor anyone else. That applies for all. This thread is not made for tell someone off or, bawl someone out or accuse of something. It was only made for the purpose that I can apologize and ask that players come to me, if something is wrong. I also don't want that anyone starts discussing about patric - I'm so egoistically and claim this whole thread for me alone
Please, let us all be friendly and open for once (smileys for peace!)



Edit: A hell of spelling mistakes and typos....

I for one have nothing against you or Patric. You both RP very well and are fun to be around. I've not seen either of you do the things that some of the players have accused you of doing.

Just my small part on it.
~Eric

As you wished I won't write now what I would have wrote. All i can say is, it makes me angry to read that. All that accusations are bald-faced and wrong...i can imagine very well from which guys that came...and i could write pages now about my opinion about them...but i wont.

i just say, jen is one of the best roleplayers we ever had in illarion...she is one of the most important peoples for the ingame roleplay...much more than me or any of you guys who made that stupid accusations...

And all that accusations are really a shame for this game...and it drags the community into the dirt that someone like jen, a great roleplayers like her, who gave us so much wonderful hours of roleplay, got insulted like that by enviers


I am greatly dissapointed by the part of the community who agreed on that

Samantha Meryadeles wrote:As you wished I won't write now what I would have wrote. All i can say is, it makes me angry to read that. All that accusations are bald-faced and wrong...i can imagine very well from which guys that came...and i could write pages now about my opinion about them...but i wont.

i just say, jen is one of the best roleplayers we ever had in illarion...she is one of the most important peoples for the ingame roleplay...much more than me or any of you guys who made that stupid accusations...

And all that accusations are really a shame for this game...and it drags the community into the dirt that someone like jen, a great roleplayers like her, who gave us so much wonderful hours of roleplay, got insulted like that by enviers

You see... that's not what I quite want to read here, because it's exactly that kind of stuff that will turn this thread into some flame war. It doesn't matter who these accusation come from, or not. It only matters if they are true or not. Since I believe there is always a glint of truth in it, I have to ask myself, what I've done wrong. And that is all this thread is about.
It's not about making anyone angry or upset.
It's not about praising my roleplay

It's only about that I want to make people understand me. And that I want to understand people.

When I heard about these accusations I was, to say the least, shocked. Jen is not only a great rolplayer and a very kind person, she also always tried to enhance the roleplaying experience for everyone, especially newbies. I've seen her taking care of new players where others would already have lost their last nerve.

I can just assume that those people who made these accusations are either blind or envious and see things that aren't there.

Adano Eles wrote:I can just assume that those people who made these accusations are either blind or envious and see things that aren't there.

Pssst, what did I say?

I'm not trying to insult anyone here, but just to state an observation from memory, quests back in the 2004-2005ish time period were extremely narrow in terms of which players were involved. And everyone else was just like "ok yeah" and did their own thing.

I'm not trying to flame anyone, just suggest them to open their eyes and see the light

And I don't make any assumptions on the source of these accusations either. Those know who they are, and they know if they have the courage to say it into your face if they think there'S something you are doing wrong.
You always give your best, Jen. You're human too and may make mistakes, but I believe you are devaluating yourself a bit here.

'm not trying to insult anyone here, but just to state an observation from memory, quests back in the 2004-2005ish time period were extremely narrow in terms of which players were involved. And everyone else was just like "ok yeah" and did their own thing.

Hm. Last year, I remember the spider quest, and the lich war, they were getting people really involved. Maybe more quests like that would help?

2004-2005 are long gone, Fooser. If these complains are based on events that long ago then they are meaningless to me.

Well I see mention of Caitlin and such, so I assume that is the period theyre talking about?

Look, Jen..
I will write tommorow to this.. You asked me to write in a neutral way..
But right now my feelings would let this end up in a flame war..

Just this:

Of course POAdano and Patric and me are angry. Because we know that this is not true..

ANd whats making me angry the most is that it goes that far, that you, Jen, are really starting to believe all this... lets say rumors, ((sounds nicer than bullshit)), and searching the sollution with looking at yourself..

If you want me to delete this post ask me personal..

Okay. Jen for one is a great roleplayer and i've never ever ever seen a better player...Never.

although I wouldn't agree with Patty saying the people that complain should be hung drawn and quatered but the thing about quests is utter crap.

I <3 your roleplaying so don't change


EDIT: Plus, Jen is the only person to make me read a full apology thread.

Only german, sorry:

Ich kenne deine (meisten) Charas nicht, insofern kann ich konkret dazu nix sagen.
Aber es ist mir auch schon vorgekommen, dass ich mich über ein, zwei Personen geärgert habe bzw. ärgere, die scheinbar recht aggressiv sich in den Mittelpunkt (z.B. eines Quests) rollenspielen...

Vielleicht sollte man mal zwischendurch kurz sein eigenes Rollenspiel reflektieren: Mag sein, dass der Charakter tatsächlich so handeln würde, aber eventuell wirkt es ja auch anders auf andere Spiele, so wie von dir beschrieben ("Man, der/die schon wieder...!").

Jedoch würde ich mich dann auch als Auf-den-Schlips-Getretener nicht hinterrücks darüber beschweren, sondern OOC oder vielleicht auch IC irgendwie darauf hinweisen. Die POs, die unabsichtlich sich in den Mittelpunkt zu drängen scheinen, werden es dann sicher bemerken, und andere, die wirklich "wichtig" sein wollen , werden's ignorieren. Dann kann man ja immer noch !gm'en.

Xalliar wrote:I also don't see a point in taking her name in vain, it just shows how ridiculous those statements are - Why didn't these people tell it to herself?!

I've been told that those people are friends of mine. So I take it, they didn't tell me, because they did not want to hurt me or to get me upset with them. So I guess it's okay.

Also the fact that those apparently are friends of mine, would strengthen the fact that there actually is a glint of truth of those reproaches.

If they would be really friends they would talk with you...and not behind your back with others...that don't makes them much friends in my eyes. and also not really relielable

No it's fine. I know that I can be quite capricious at times.



Oh, and Liles, thanks for reading the whole thread. *g*

I can only speak for myself, but I would be hurt even more if I heard from a GM that people I consider friends talk ill about me in a public chatroom where the staff is always around, but not speak to me personally about the matters.

peoples here have the habbit. They did and do it often with me. also with others. it is a very bad attitude *sighs*

Back to topic

if they are real friends they will post in this thread, for the first, to tell how they think, and for the second to appologize..
nothing against crtic, but if do so, do it in her face, not behind her back
then, they re friends...

Enwell van Illdoran wrote:if they are real friends they will post in this thread, for the first, to tell how they think, and for the second to appologize..
nothing against crtic, but if do so, do it in her face, not behind her back
then, they re friends...

No, I don't think at all that this is necessary. If they are my friends, they will message me in msn about it or write me a pm.

We don't need to pillory anyone here

well, may be there are your friends then..


but without answering this thread, they stay friends without asses and balls

Sometimes, people with a disliking for a person - or even a short anger - can talk in a bad way about someone. Others hear that, who perhaps get it in the wrong ear and then talk about rumors or subjective-angry things they heard as if about facts.
That's how some complaints can develop. Sometimes, we all have the little feeling to be interesting to others, and of course we then can throw in "I know something..."
And for some reason, people can also talk like that about other people without really thinking about the consequences at the moment.
We all should try to be humans, not assholes.

I have already voiced my opinoun to the one it matters to. That is all that matters to me.

You know what? There's two sides to this. Everyone who blindly praises her and says that anyone who thinks otherwise is an idiot? Yeah, shut the smile up. Everyone who wants her out just because she's got a swollen ego from the likes of Patric? Yeah, shut the smile up too.

Next time you want to voice your opinion, give some damn reasoning behind it.

Ich war's nicht. Dein RP ist spitze, Jen.

(Werd' ja gern bei sowas verdächtigt.)

*gg* Danke, Manuel. Auch wenns ja so gesehen gar nicht um mein RP selbst ging. Ich bin übrigens fest davon überzeugt, dass wenn du ein Problem mit mir hast, du damit zu mir selbst kommst

I am on a friend's computer, and therefore will be writing nowhere near as much as I would like to on this topic. However, with that said, I want to address (for now ) issue 2.

I am... so shocked to hear this about my sweet Jen Jen. Seriously. When I first came to Illarion almost a year ago, I was incredibly timid. I saw the names of the popular, well-known, "old" players on the forums. Caitlin Fergus being one of them. And I was intimidated and scared. However, I also wanted Ava to be a druid. So I wrote my timid letter to this grand Caitlin Fergus and waited. And I was soooooo nervous when I went in game to meet her. Because I was afraid of the elitism that you are all speaking about. And you know what I found? Caitlin Fergus. Not an elitist PO. Not someone *so* high up on her horse that I never wanted to play again. In fact, her name on the online list made me jump in game. Jen sticks to her character concepts so well and she just plain keeps her ooc ooc and ic ic. PO Pendar introduced me to her, and I admit I was nervous, cause I was expectiung the player of Caitlin Fergus to be.. well... very self-assured, cocky, and all around "elitist". But she wasn't. She answered a million and a half questions for me, she pulled me into rp I might otherwise have walked by, and she's been part of what has made my Illarion experience so wonderful. I might have stayed if it weren't for her, there are a bunch of other characters and POs that I love here, but Jen Jen is really exceptional and amazing when it comes to being fair and helping newbies.

Stick that in your elitist pipe and smoke it. I'f you can only see the bad in someone's rp because they aren't as shy as you, or are popular and you therefore you think they shun newbies, take another look. Before one is judgemental toward others, they should really take a look at both sides and be prepared to be as judgemental toward themselves. Otherwise it's nothing more than a bitchfest by someone who didn't get their way perfectly.
(please don't yell at me Jen )

1.) I try to be the center of every quests with my character and therewith I squeeze out 'newbies'

No, even though I find you being the center of a lot of quests, and it sometimes gets...Annoying. For me atleast. I am probably the most emotionally unstable player here though, together with a few others, so in general these things can happen.
Also, I do not think you are squeezing out the newbies, you are involving them. This is awesome.

I guess I just have serious jealousy issues when atleast 4 pages are dedicated to you and your various chars. Your overly loved ones that is. The second a char is popular it will become overly mentioned in there, and I feel jealous. ;_; (over-attachment problems yeah, sue me for it)

2.) I'm elitist and I scare away players.

No, you are definately not elitist. You helped me perfectly with that lizard ingame today.
If anything I would be the "elitist" everyone is talking about, because I might become slightly cliqueish at times in some people's eyes. I (!!) am sorry for that. I will try to change this as soon as possible.

You are not scaring away any players, if anything, you are involving them more in the overarching plots that sometimes run in Illa. Thank you.



And Patric, please get this degrading and in general offensive tone out of your posts, because I do feel it in there.

i just say, jen is one of the best roleplayers we ever had in illarion...she is one of the most important peoples for the ingame roleplay...much more than me or any of you guys who made that stupid accusations...

Without JEn we will not fall to pieces.

I am greatly dissapointed by the part of the community who agreed on that

I am disappointed in you in the mere fact that you are disappointed about every single player, every single initiative (Kudos to Rinya for keeping strong), and every single attempt at RP that just happens to destroy your event.

i can imagine very well from which guys that came.

Did you have any clue it could have been me?

If they would be really friends they would talk with you...and not behind your back with others...that don't makes them much friends in my eyes. and also not really relielable

*cancels his friendship-subscription in this case*



And no, I did not voice this opinion on some public chatroom.

And Enwell, do I have balls enough?

And Cassy, I remember that post oddly enough.