Illarion.org

A furiously written note attracts your attention as some people crowd around it laughing

Attention!

Just today, I was minding my own business selling a couple books in town when an orc who looked like ((53***)) confronted me. He stared at me for a moment, and decided to remove his war hammer (which he seemed to pull out from his anal region, quite a tricky trick, but thats an orc for you) and decided attack me for no reason whatsoever. I was fortunate enough to escape back to the depot by the tavern, but he pursued. He trapped me between the hedges and swung his hammer yet again, but his obviously weak arms couldn't take me down as of yet! I skillfully retreated into the forest where his large blundering orcish legs could not sustain him to catch up to me, and I am now writing to you. BEWARE: This mad orc is crazy and WILL attack for no reason at all! Run whenever you catch sight of him, or it will lead to trouble! Keep children inside at all times. Vicious orcs roam the streets of Trollsbane! Wash/or burn your old socks and your protection will be ensured! Watch out!

Signed,
A concerned citizen

An extra scribble can be seen below the signature
Could perhaps the town guard investigate this? It will be a wonderful day when the beast is caught.

Reads the note and spits at it

Da orc dat be chasing dis man be called Lorck, the man insulted dis orc perviously to terday and da orc swore if he saw da oomie agains he would kill him. Da orc chased da coward who ran like little hobbit. Now he say orc pull hammer from his rump, now orc have more reason ter slay dis stoopid human and da human is a chaos priest, mad in da head. Me dont tink orc will stop chasing da oomie untill he kills em.


I be sure bout dat because da orc be me.

Lorck

Ceigan wrinkles his nose at the spittle on his note and tries to wipe it off, he fails and writes back

It is absolutely splendid to see you've come out in the open. Whatever do you mean a new reason to kill him? I'm just a concerned citizen. As I recall though, I never heard whoever it may be insulting Lorck. But maybe Lorck is just bloodthirsty, and trying to scrape up any excuse he can manage to muster so he can use his smelly hammer against innocent people. Theres a thought! I say we roast this heathen.

Kind regards,
Another concerned citizen

Ceigan giggles a bit and turns away to find some capes

Growls as he reads the last note, he writes in ogre blood.

When a oomie calls an orc dear, er love er dyluck and wont be shuttting up, orcs usually tend ter loose der temper far earlyer dan when me did. Yer lucky ter be alive, and as fer me being weak, ill show ye who is weak if ye bloody stand still yer coward, fight back ye fool.

Lorck

Orcs are evil. Join the Defender of Good so can I maybie help you.
/Sylian Steelfighter, Defender of Good.

Well, I didn't know words hurt you so much Lorck--how sensitive! I had no idea your thoughts were so easily swayed by some little things! (But, that IS an orc for you..?) It's wonderful to know there are orcs wandering Trollsbane who will vigorously chase someone for little things. All I see here is you being quite giddy to take up your hammer. Although, Now that I do think about it, fighting IN town is illegal, isn't it? And you have attacked me in town--Hey! Theres your proof Pendar! Sylian! After having experience after experience with these horrid orcs--I'm beginning to see how they are! I'm going to send you a dove.

Thats some great red ink Lorck,
Concerned Citizen

This will all be looked into.

Garett Gwenour
Town Guard

Splendid to hear Garett. If you like, we can meet and I can show you that arm that the orc hammered away on. Good to see it's being handled. Don't forget to burn/wash your old socks!

Yours Truly,
A Concerned Citizen That was Nearly Mauled by a Vicious Orc

Dis wont end as ye tink it will, human. Soon...soon...

the note is left unsigned though there is little doubt to who wrote it.

Oh fine, fine. I'd beware of the Prancing Magenta Troll of Madness, though. He may rip your soul right out! Wouldn't that be a sight!
Ceigan giggles and leaves the note unsigned