((This is intended to be a closed RP. A farewell of sorts to a char I have loved for years, and want to give a proper final chapter to. Not saying there will never be a epilogue, but for now, her story appears to have reached its end. Thank you for indulging my fantasy that anyone but me cares about her ))
Samantha sighed as she scraped the remains of dinner into a large bowl, then whistled, listening for the heavy steps of the tired old dog. After a second whistle, Bruce appeared, looking rather disgruntled until he saw the food. She reached down to scratch behind his ears as he ate.
“She’ll be fine for a few minutes while you eat. I promise.” The dog made a sound resembling a huff, and she turned to finish cleaning the dishes.
Bruce and Phoe had been nearly inseparable since Azure’s departure, both more than a little upset at being left behind. The girl was far too young, the dog far too old and though they both knew that, it was still difficult to swallow. She would say another prayer to Zhambra that he might convince Cherga not to come for the dog until the girl’s heart had mended a bit, or the man had returned. Truthfully, she was not eager to see the grey lady come for the family’s faithful companion at all, but she knew that it was a miracle he had made it this long.
It will destroy her if she loses him now. Sam thought, scrubbing the plate a little harder. Damn it Azure. You’d better be staying on the straight and narrow, or I’ll set your rear ablaze. The dog woofed softly, as if in agreement, then slowly made his way back to his girl’s room to stand guard. The woman moved instead to the desk, deciding it was time to write a letter.
Azure,
I hope this letter finds you well... or at least still alive with no bounties on your head.
Bruce has taken your place as the grumpy old man as of late. He rarely leaves Phoe's side, except to come whine at me when I've been out of his sight too long. He howls when we leave the house without him, though we all know he cannot make the walk into town. And may the Gods have mercy on anyone who knocks at our door. The old dog turns into a ferocious young pup when any stranger calls. Of course, our daughter does little to discourage him, practically growling at them herself.
I do wonder if I should get another dog to soften the blow when the old man finally gives into his age, but dogs are more your area of expertise. I would bring home a lazy mutt, or one too daft to be trained. Perhaps the next time you find yourself here, we can find one. A wildling like ours needs a good companion for her adventures.
And our wildling is doing well, finally getting herself back into a routine, and visiting my parents more. She and Bruce will head out some mornings after breakfast, and not return until nearly bed time. Mama says she helps Papa with all the work you did for them. When you left, I hired a young man to take care of the firewood and all the repairs, but he ends up just fixing things that are out of Phoe's reach or realm of understanding. Often when Aleyah and I go to do their cleaning, we will find him teaching her how to repair something new. She says that Papa tells her the house will be hers one day, and she does not want to waste coin every time something breaks. Perhaps we have raised her to be a bit too independent?
And speaking of young men, I do wonder at Phoe's new hunting partner. The tavern owner's son has been coming round more frequently since you left. Though I wouldn't worry much, Bruce won't let him within arm's reach of her, and Phoe rewards the dog well once he's gone. The boy has been bringing meats to win him over, and I haven't the heart to tell him that the only way the dog will relent is upon your command. He never did listen to me as well as you. Even less once Phoe learned to talk.
Forgive me, I intended this to be a short note to let you know we were all doing well, and it turned into a novel. I suppose you are not surprised with the way I tend to ramble on endlessly. I am sure Phoe will write you as well, and I've paid the local couriers extra to ensure her letters are treated with extra care.
I do hope you're taking care of yourself as well, if for no reason other than a girl needs her father, even more than her dog.
Sam
Sealing the letter, she decided it could wait until morning to send. A glance out the window told her it was probably close to midnight, and she needed to rest.
“Why are you going?” Her mother asked, her lips pursed with worry.
“If he has the target of Gray on his back, and he comes here, who might follow him? That is why I’m having Aleyah take you three somewhere safer until I return.” Sam held up a hand, shaking her head. “I do worry he’ll get himself killed, Mama. But, Phoe is always the priority. Once I know she is safe, then I can focus on how to make her father see that getting his fool-self killed will crush her.”
“And you?” The question caused Sam to pause in her packing, brows raised.
“Mama…. We have been over this. I stopped loving him ages ago. I never found another man because I was not putting myself, or Phoe, through that torture again. My happily ever after is me watching my daughter grow into a woman who uses her head, even when following her heart.” Folding a dress carefully into her bag, she shrugged. “She is all that matters in the end. I think we’ve done alright so far.”
“All parents want to see their children happy.” The elder woman moved around the bed, placing a soft kiss on her daughter’s forehead.
“I should have run him off the first time he showed his face here.” Her father snarled from the doorway. “Knew he was trouble.”
“You thought he was trouble, Papa. And you came to love him like a son. Do not try to lie to me.” Sam smiled softly at the grumbled response. “I know you two are upset by his departure as well. But think of how it must feel for Aleyah. She’s been left with a family that is not truly her own. Phoe is her only blood here.”
“We won’t turn her out!” her mother scoffed. “She’s part of this family now too.”
“I know. I am just reminding you that we are all feeling the loss. There is no need to hide it.” Sam sighed, closing her bag. “He has been here for the better part of a decade. We’ve all grown to see him as part of our family, despite all that happened. And I thank you two for letting old grudges die so that could happen. Now, I need your help in seeing Phoe through this transistion.”
Her parents nodded, any reply cut off by Phoe running through the front door. Sam quickly hid her travel bag under the bed, focusing on a pile of half-folded laundry instead.
“Mama? Mama!” Phoe’s smile was bright as she burst into the room, the old dog at her heels. “Aunt Aleyah is taking us on a trip!”
“She is taking you, on a trip, love. You know I don’t travel well.” Sam had smiled, picking up another dress from the pile, moving to hang it in the wardrobe.
“But… you can’t stay here alone.” Phoe’s face had fallen. “No offense Mama, but you are easy prey.”
“Your magic studies may have surpassed mine, child, but I can still manage a bit of fire.” Sam chuckled, shaking her head. “I will not be staying here alone though. I will stay with Constance and George in town until you return. Surely you cannot object to a constable as a proper guardian?”
The front door opened again, and Aleyah could be heard whistling as she walked to the kitchen.
“Sounds like Auntie is here to get lunch on.” Sam’s mother smiled, moving towards the door. “Why don’t we go see if she needs any help?”
“Yes, Gran.” Phoe gave Sam a suspicious look before turning to follow her grandmother down the hall.
“You’re a terrible liar, Samantha.” Her father whispered, reaching out to pat her shoulder. “It is one of your best traits. Don’t worry, we’ll throw her off your scent.”
He gave her a wink, then headed out the door. Sam sighed, running her hands over her face. She was debating feigning ill and hiding in bed the rest of the day, when Bruce appeared in the doorway, whining. She patted her leg, calling him over, but he simply whined at her again. Walking towards the door, she grinned as he turned for the kitchen.
((At this point, I will leave the story sit for a bit while I sort out the ending. If anyone would like to join in before I send her off, I welcome it.))
She’d arrived late at night, possibly even early morning. The shadows cast over the gate of Galmair as she walked in had made the city seem even more foreboding than she recalled. The guard barely acknowledged the hooded figure as she hurried through the gates. She didn’t blame them. What harm could a chubby old woman do?
Her heart sped up as she counted the steps, knowing she would be there soon. She tried to focus her attention on other things, counting the steps to the inn, pondering if that mana pool still sat atop that flat, anything but that place. She took the left fork in the road, and breathed a sigh of relief. The sudden sound of glass shattering had her turning on her heel.
Grator glared at the ruined bottle on his table, muttering to himself. He gave her a half-hearted apology, and she nodded numbly, eyes fixed on the kitchen. Whispers of that fateful night echoing in her head like thunder.
“Papa? Mister Lynch? Ma'am my name is Viktor von Gauss”
“Piss off Azure. You want to hurt me, fine. But to hurt our child like this....”
“The next person that calls me Azure will see the end of my axe.”
Phoe was shrieking, fighting like mad to get to the man who was walking away. Sam held her tightly with one arm, the other digging out the ring and tossing it at him as hard as she could.
“Feck off Azure. You can have that back... I've already begun the process of the divorce.”
He’d stopped, pulling his axe from his back. She should have run, she always ran. Sam had the fighting instincts of a rabbit. But something held her in place.
“You'll attack your wife?”
“I’m not Azure I don’t know you”
“You're a liar and a fecking idiot!”
The rest was a blur. She’d told him to go, she hoped she never saw him again. Someone outside was shouting, trying to locate the source of the commotion. Then he’d slammed the axe into the wall, hard enough to crack the stone. She’d meant to leave, when an orc had burst in, attacking Azure and leaving her with no escape. So, she and Phoe had cowered beneath the table until Leon arrived and chased them both off.
After he’d given her a dagger for protection, and offered to help any way possible, he’d taken her somewhere safe to collect herself. They’d talked for some time about the difference between people and books.
“And I simply meant there will be no winning the girl in my happily ever after. Mine will be just me and Phoe. A girl raised by her crazy mother, and crazier aunt.”
“And uncle with his massive family…” he’d told her about how he and his wife had met, and how well they worked as a team. “Fear not. You'll find someone like that.”
Oh how wrong he had been.
Sam shivered, telling herself Galmair was simply cooler than Falmhara as she turned back towards the inn. She wasn’t quite sure how she made it to the bed, but she eagerly collapsed into it. Rest did not come though, only nightmares and cold sweat. When she stumbled out into the light of day, she felt like she’d not slept in months.
She’d intended to find Azure, or at least find someone who could point her to him. Voices drifted down the street from the kitchen, so she’d grudgingly turned her feet that direction. What followed was nearly chaotic as the night she’d dreamt about.
Two men, rushing in from behind her, scaring her half to death. One of them eyeing her curiously as he mulled over why her name rang a bell. A woman in dark clothes, whispering warnings not to reveal herself, because she was in danger because of Azure. As the walls closed in on her, she ran back into the street, desperately trying to catch her breath.
Suddenly, the dark woman was whispering in her ear. She jumped, throwing her hat. She had turned to pick it up, telling herself she should just go to the Hemptie and send Azure a note, when he had appeared in front of her.
“Azure. Wolfsword. Lynch!”
“Hey! Sam....?”
She was confused, scared, and tired. Then he pointed to the girl behind him.
“That... is Amelia? By the Gods, Azure.... is she Phoe's age?!?!” she’d whispered in shock.
“No she is five years older but I get she is young but she has helped keep me on the straight and narrow and I do care for her.” He’d whispered back.
“Messing about with Jefferson... and girls half your age. And sworn enemies too! This... this was a mistake.”
Then some insane man was shouting, and Amelia ran off. She thought they might get away to speak privately. But then the insane man was struck down by Leon in front of them. Amelia went to tend to the man’s wounds, and Azure followed to help. Somehow she ended up outside the gates, with two pups following her. Leon sat beside the fire with a woman, who tried to lure her out to sit with them.
“Was it always a drama theatre in Galmair?” The woman had asked.
“I do have a habit of causing drama in the kitchen. And Mister Leon always seems to know just when to arrive and save the day.”
“I didn't save anything, or anybody” Leon shook his head.
“Well, you saved me from a rather uncomfortable conversation with Azure.”
“Glad to help with that”
“That makes twice now. No broken kitchen walls this time though. So, we've improved.”
“Mm. Try and keep it outside, eh?”
“I plan to catch the next boat back to Falmhara.”
“You’re going back?” Sam had barely noticed the woman’s question as Leon fell silent and returned his gaze to the fire.
It appeared she was failing at every turn tonight. As she plotted to excuse herself without looking like she was running, Azure appeared again.
“I didn’t mean to worry you. I promised I would not be that man ever again. And I will keep that vow.”
“None of my business anymore, Azure.”
“We’re still friends?”
The weight of the moment hit her like a thousand stones. She’d excused herself without really answering the question.
Now, she sat on the floor in front of the fire, the two pups beside her whimpering now and then in their dreams as if to say “Why won’t you sleep?” Sleep could not come when she was this upset though. This entire trip had been a mistake. She never travelled well to begin with, and a storm had made the journey longer. That should have been her warning to just go back home.
Home. Galmair had been that once. Now, it was a cold and foreign place that she could not wait to get out of. When the sun rose, she would head to the harbor, and pray they had a boat leaving soon. Until then, she would hide from the world outside the inn, and figure out what she was going to tell her daughter.
She never travelled well, and it was worse when her mind and heart were troubled. She could not see the sky to tell the time, but the rest of the ship had quieted ages ago. A lone set of footsteps had wandered the corridor for some time after, she had assumed a member of the crew keeping watch. The feet had paused outside her cabin door, but when they growled together, the pups sounded much larger, and the steps had hurried away. At least the protective instinct was strong.
“Perhaps I shall name you Evie and Leon.” She’d grinned, scratching both behind the ears. Their tails had wagged lazily, heads cocked to the side in confusion. They’d been so adorable that she’d lifted them both onto the bed to cuddle with her. A mistake she was sure to regret when they grew larger, but for now it was a small comfort.
She sighed, looking up at the ceiling. She knew nothing of dog training. Azure had trained Bruce, and was supposed to train these two. He’d started, that much was clear, but they weren’t ready to be turned over to a woman and girl who were likely to spoil them into lazy mutts.
Your own fault. Her mind chided. You just had to ruin things again.
After spending a sleepless night at the inn in Galmair, she’d headed to the harbor to secure passage on a ship home. Unfortunately, the storm that had delayed her arrival had caused some damage to a few ships. Those that weren’t awaiting repair were hesitant to head out until they knew the sea was calmer.
Things were made worse when the captain of a ship heading in the right direction patted her shoulder in an effort to win her confidence in himself and his crew. The pups had nipped at him, and one had relieved itself on his shoe. Mortified, he’d told her that he wouldn’t allow such wild beasts on his vessel, and he’d ensure none of the others would either. The only captain who took pity on her would be stuck awaiting repairs for another day or two.
Unable to face Galmair again, she took herself to the Hemptie.
Borgate had reluctantly shown her to a room, reminding her that she was a bit soft to be out in the wild. He’d given her strict instructions not to open the door for anyone, and a portal book to get out if needed. Thankfully it had been a peaceful stay. She only left the room when the dogs needed to do their business, smiling softly as Borgate appeared in the doorway to “get some fresh air” every time. He’d always had a bit of a soft spot for her. Especially after the night that two drinks had required a companion carrying her home from the Fluffy Sheep. There was a heart of gold beneath that beard, she just knew it.
Between the brief excursions to find the perfect bush, she’d written two letters, begging for time and patience for her daughter. Once Phoe realized her father was not coming home, she would be crushed. Her parents’ divorce had been finalized long before she was old enough to understand what the word meant, but she likely had no clear memories of living in a truly broken home. Her mother certainly did though.
The gentle sway of the boat brought her back to the present and added to the churning of her stomach. She closed her eyes, recalling the weeks answering questions about where Dada was, tiny lips trembling as she struggled to understand. Some days, Sam would put on a smile and distract the girl with stories of great adventures, or trips to the kitchen in Runewick to bake cookies. Some days, she would simply hold the child and try to hide the fact that she was crying too. As a tear slid down her cheek now, she wondered why this hurt so much.
Because he’s leaving you too, you fool.
When she’d finally realized how alone she was, she’d taken Phoe to stay with her parents. As it became clear the arrangement was likely permanent, her father had built them a small house on his property. It was far enough away to give them privacy, but close enough that a shout could summon him. She took up working in her father’s bakery, and teaching Phoe how to grow a garden. It was a fresh start, free from her ghosts.
She’d never forget the night she’d opened the door to find her largest phantom standing there.
He’d never told her how long he’d waited outside, only that he’d worked up the courage to come to the door once he knew she’d put Phoe to bed. The mountain of a man had looked so small when he told her that he didn’t want to make his child cry again. Torn between slamming the door in his face and screaming at the top of her lungs, Sam had simply stepped back from the doorway and gestured to the kitchen table.
“I know you won’t take me back, and I don’t blame you. But Phoe…” his voice had cracked. “Is there a chance…?”
“She’s happy here.” Sam studied the woodgrain of the table.
“I don’t want to change that, Sam. I just-“ he reached for her hand, recoiling when she flinched. “I screwed up. Big time. Let me fix what I can?”
They’d talked late into the night, dancing carefully around the topic of their relationship to focus on their child. An agreement was reached that he would see their daughter under Sam’s watchful eye, and only if he could prove himself stable. His presence in her life was solely dependent on his actions. One slip up, and he was gone.
It had turned out to be one of the few good decisions Sam had made. In time, he’d settled near them, and they had lived like a family. Perhaps she’d never sought another husband, because she had one. He fulfilled every duty of a father and husband, except the romantic ones. Some might even say she had the best of both worlds.
Now she was faced with divorce again, though she feared this one would be much more painful. The first was the dissolution of a young marriage. A sapling broken in a heavy wind. This was an Eldan Oak, so old one would struggle to count the rings, split in two by lightning during a sudden summer storm. The kind that turns the sky black with no warning, before it opens up and pours. Then just as quickly, it is gone. The birds resume their songs, a rainbow dances between the clouds, and everything sparkles beautifully… except the charred corpse of a once proud and mighty tree.
No matter how pure his intentions, Azure was leaving his family. Phoe would face the loss again, just as suddenly as before. The young woman might comprehend a bit better than the toddler did, but Sam wasn’t sure if that was a blessing or a curse. She only hoped that she would have the strength to guide her daughter through this. If the girl needed someone to blame, she would take that burden and bear it until the storm had calmed.
At some point, the gentle sway of the boat and the warmth from the pups curled against her side had made it easy for the exhaustion to overtake her.
The rest of the journey was uneventful, with Sam hiding in her little cabin as much as possible. Idly, she wondered how she had enjoyed solitude so much before Phoe. At one point, her favorite place had been the most secluded corner of a library. Alone with the silence and her books, nothing else mattered. Now, it simply felt empty and cold.
She sent word to Aleyah at the last port before home, hoping another storm would not delay her return. Luck was on her side however, and she managed to make it back the night before the others. Home was a welcome sight, but the empty and cold feeling soon returned. She missed Phoe’s giggles, the sound of Bruce trying to keep up with her, and Azure’s laughter as Aleyah failed at keeping a straight face long enough to scold them all. Without her family, a home was simply a house.
Much to her disappointment, sleeping in her own bed did not help her restlessness.
She’d spent the morning unpacking, watching as the pups sniffed all of Bruce’s favorite spots to lay, and praying to whatever Gods might be listening for strength and patience. She knew the storm she was about to face would be painful. Her only hope was that it would not last long, and that her daughter would emerge with as little damage as possible. She was just starting a soup simmering on the fire when she heard Phoe’s shout.
“Mama? Mama!” she burst through the door, stopping short and letting out with an excited squeal at the two pups. Bruce, however, looked at her as though she’d committed the ultimate betrayal. “Is Dad here?”
The girl crouched down to greet the pups, eyes scanning the room excitedly. Sam shook her head, glancing up as her parents and Aleyah walked in. Four smiles fell into frowns.
“But, the dogs. Are they not from him?” Phoe remained crouched, though the pups had moved to sniff at Bruce.
“They are. He hasn’t named them yet, he thought you might like to.”
“Where is he?”
“In Galmair.” Sam braced herself as her daughter rose again.
“But how…?” Phoe’s hands clenched. “Did he come home while I was gone? Why didn’t you send for us?”
“No, Phoe.” Sam shook her head again. “I went to Galmair to check on him. He will be coming for a visit soon though.”
“You went to Galmair?!” The girl crossed her arms over her chest, looking very much like the woman Sam saw in the mirror when she was cross. “Why didn’t you take me?”
“Because it is a dangerous place right now, Phoenix.” Sam reached out to rest her hand on the girl’s shoulder. “I will take you there someday if you want, but not right no-“
“Wait.” Phoe tilted her head. “You said visit. Don’t you mean he’ll come home soon?”
Sam shook her head, struggling to find the words. Bruce, seeming to sense the tension brewing, moved between them. He took turns nudging and licking each of their hands while the pups went to greet the rest of the family. After what felt like years, Sam sighed.
“He’s decided to make Galmair his home now, Phoe.” She moved her hand up to her daughter’s cheek, forcing a small smile. “But we will see him soon. And I promise, we’ll try to visi-“
“What did you do?!” Phoe batted her hand away, eyes suddenly turning to storm clouds.
“Phoenix Ava Lynch!” her father startled everyone into silence for a moment with the uncharacteristic raising of his voice. “You do not use that tone with your mother.”
“It is alright, Papa.” Sam gave the others a weak smile and nod. “Perhaps you should all go settle in at home. Phoe and I have much to discuss. We can have dinner later though.”
Sam’s parents stood firmly, looking between the mother and daughter for a moment. Finally, Aleyah stepped in, murmuring softly to both and herding them towards the door. They each mumbled something about talking later as they shuffled out. Left alone, Sam braced herself for the impact.
The attack that followed was one for the history books, if they wrote about battles of words the way they did ones with swords. Phoe accused her of everything from nagging Azure like an old fishwife, to making him feel unwelcome in their home, to not cooking the cakes he liked often enough. Sam stood straight, quietly listening to all of the things they both knew weren’t true, letting the girl pour out all of her anger and hurt. When she thought she’d finally reached the end, she reached for the girl, murmuring softly that it was okay. Phoe sidestepped the embrace, and started again. And so, they danced in circles. Until finally, Phoe dealt a blow that truly hurt.
“You knew he still loved you.” Phoe’s voice was raw from the shouting and emotional overload. “Why couldn’t you thaw that icy heart and love him back?”
Sam inhaled sharply, her back straightening a bit more. Phoe’s eyes sparked at finally having cracked her mother’s placid façade, but she seemed to realize instantly that there was no feeling of victory in the feat. She wiped roughly at the tears on her cheeks, her eyes falling to her feet in shame.
“I’m sorry.” The girl’s voice was small and weak, the fight finally drained from her.
“You don’t have to be sorry for being upset, sweetheart.” Sam reached out to carefully run a hand over her daughter’s hair. “This is a lot to take in, and everything has happened so quickly.”
Phoe nodded, keeping her head down.
“You know that your father and I both love you more than anything. That will never change.” Sam tried to sound hopeful. “We will figure this out. Promise.”
“May I go to my room now?” Phoe kept her head down.
“Of course. I’ll call you when dinner is ready.”
Phoe turned to go, and Sam’s hand fell limply to her side. Bruce was at her heels and the pups started to follow, then paused, confused as to why Sam simply sank into the nearest chair. In the end, they decided the new human and dog were more interesting, and she heard Bruce’s huff of distaste as they scurried into the room just before the door was shut. Resting her elbows on the table, Sam bowed her head and cried.
She wasn’t sure how long she had sat like that, when suddenly a bowl of water appeared in front of her. Aleyah wordlessly handed her two small towels, then turned her back to stir the soup. As she washed her face, Sam briefly mused that the woman would make an excellent thief if she chose. Of course, it was far more likely that she had been so caught up in herself, she would not have heard a golem crashing through the kitchen.
“The sun will be setting soon.” Aleyah spoke softly. “Why don’t you set the table before your parents get here?”
Sam nodded, moving the wash bowl and towels out of the way before she began pulling dishes from the shelves. The other woman quietly filled a bowl, putting it on a tray with some bread and a bottle of juice, before heading down the hall. She returned a few minutes later, falling into step with Sam as they finished preparing for the meal.
Dinner was quiet and strained, everyone seeming to walk on eggshells to avoid the topic on their minds. Her parents declined staying for cake and tea by the fire, claiming weariness from their travels. Aleyah saw them to the door, then promptly shooed Sam out of her own kitchen with instructions to stop thinking and rest.
Instead, Sam stared at the ceiling until long after the sounds of dishes being cleaned quieted. Light moved down the hall, then back with three sets of paws eagerly following it out the back door. After a while, it returned. The paws pausing to sniff at her door before rushing back to their girl. Sam watched the light beneath her door pass again, then slowly grow dimmer, until it was gone. The back door closed firmly, and silence enveloped the house again.
After what felt like years, agonizing over every detail of the past several weeks, Sam’s thoughts were interrupted by the creak of a door. A moment later, her own door cracked open and a figure moved across the room to climb in her bed. Soft whining was heard for a moment before a brief grunt from Bruce silenced it. As Phoe settled beside her mother, Bruce begrudgingly curled up with the pups on his blankets on the floor. They laid in silence for a while before Phoe sighed.
“I miss him.”
“I do too, sweetheart.” Sam kissed the top of her head. “But it isn’t as if we’ll never see him again. I promise, we will figure something out.”
“Why doesn’t he want us anymore?” Sam’s heart clenched at the hurt in her daughter’s voice.
“Oh love… you know that isn’t true.” She wrapped her arms around the girl as she began to sob. “This is not about you, or me. This is something your father feels he needs to do. And I hope one day you will be able to understand that.”
I hope that one day I can finally understand it myself, she added mentally.
And so they laid like that until dawn, drifting in and out of sleep. More than once, Sam woke to find her daughter clinging tightly to her, whimpering in the throes of a nightmare. Softly kissing her hair, she would murmur softly until the child quieted and sank back into a bit more peaceful slumber. When she tried to slip from the bed for a quick trip to the latrine, Phoe was wide awake, clinging to her nightgown.
“I just have to relieve myself. I’ll be back in a moment.”
She’d returned to find the child sitting up, watching the door intently.
The behavior had continued the next day, and the next. Phoe all but clung to her mother’s skirts, a shadow to her every move, with three furry shadows of her own. As it continued into yet another day, Sam began to grow concerned. She mentioned it to her own mother as they watched Phoe training the dogs in the yard. Her mother smiled, nodding slowly.
“Do you remember when you were 8 or 9, and Cousin Elizabeth took to her bed near the end of her pregnancy?”
“I do.” Sam nodded. “You went to stay with her and help her while her husband was at sea.”
“Aye. He was gone two weeks, so I was gone for three.” She chuckled. “You’d just read some book about an orphan, and you were terrified. Even with your Granny here, you wouldn’t let your father out of your sight for more than a few seconds. You thought he was going to be called away too, and then you’d be an orphan.”
“Phoe is not a silly child though, Mama.”
“No, but her life has just been turned upside down, dear.” The elder Stoneridge reached out to place her hand on the younger’s. “She is scared, and confused. Just give her time. She will settle. We all will. Promise.”
Azure seeing that Amelia would be safe with her helping Era and Oxi, he decided it was time to visit his daughter and Sam. After Sam's arrival and immediate departure, he was not for sure what kind of reception he would receive. He booked a passage and the travel was uneventful. A nice change from recent events for Azure. As he stepped off the boat he sent a dove to let them know of his arrival. He walked to the farm, t he once called home, topping the hill where he could see the houses. He watched as he saw a small young woman running toward him. Azure quickly recognized it was Phoe. He smiled but his smile didn't last long, as she ran up to him mumbling some words and launched a fireball at him. Azure barely had time to get his shield up to brace for the impact and a second later, a loud clank, as metal hit metal. He peaked over the shield to see his daughter with anger and tears in her eyes, as she struck his shield with her dagger. There where no words, just a few grunts as she continued her onslaught. Azure blocked her attacks but he could tell, she has improved. Then, on her last strike...
"How could you do this?! Do you not love us?! Do you not love me?!" Phoenix shouted. "What did we do to make you hate us?!" Azure was shocked and she through him off guard. When she went to strike, he didn't have time to block, and her dagger cut deep on his arm. Neither of them noticed at first, as he just grabbed her and brought her in for a hug. Phoe dropped her dagger and cried a bit. "Why Dad why..?", she cried into his chest hitting his armor with the hilt of her dagger, till she had no strength left. He didn't say a word. What could he say at that moment? she pulled away from him and walked off crying. As he could hear a growling and saw the old boy Bruce. Azure looked at him. "You too, huh?", he stated, before the dog followed by two pups gave chase, following Phoenix. Azure let out a small grimacing look, as he realized her dagger had cut his arm.
Azure made it to his small cottage and unloaded his equipment and changed out of his armor into his work pants. He quickly bandaged his cut before putting on his shirt, when he heard a knock on the door. "Little Dragon!?", he said as he opened it, to see Samantha. He invited her in, where both talked. Though, it was more her, who talked talked while he listened. "I warned you that she might react poorly. This is a big change, Azure. She is hurt and upset right now, because everything is falling apart in her eyes. She just needs time and patience... maybe a little space too. At least enough for you to dodge." After a while, she left, and he sat in his chair for a moment, before the door opened again and Aleyah walked in. "You know, you hurt them both with your actions.", she plainly stated. Azure looked at her. She began to speak. "We all understand, why you are staying and it is good to see you are still you.", she said as she punched the bandaged arm. "Ouch!", Azure yelled, before they both chuckled.
A few days have passed and Azure has been working in the fields and repairing what he could do. And he had gone fishing a few times, though, it wasn't the same without Phoenix. Well, one night, he heard a knock on his door. He went to open it and saw Phoenix. She had tears in her eyes. "You need to come to the house, quickly." Azure barely had time to get his coat, before she started pulling on him. When they got to Sam's house, everyone was there gathered around the fire place. All looking sad with tears in there eyes. Azure made his way and saw Bruce laying there barely, breathing. Azure knew, what it meant. It was that time, Azure just knelt beside him, petting him slowly. when Bruce took his last breathe. Azure just laid his head on the big old dog's head. "Goodbye, old friend..." Azure wrapped him up in his favorite Blanket, before he walked out the door without a word. He would grab a shovel and walk to Bruce's favorite shade tree and start digging a hole. He can hear everyone saying there goodbyes, hearing Phoe cry her heart out. When he finally finished, it started to rain. As he walked in the house and picked him up, everyone followed. No one seemed to care it was raining. As he placed him in the plot he dug. everyone tossed in something of his, from his favorite toy to his favorite snack. As Sam's parents went back in escorted by Aleyah, Sam hesitantly placed her hand on his shoulder before her and Phoe walked back inside. Azure started to cover Bruce up with the drenched earth. When he finally finished, all he could do was cry. It seemed like hours had gone by, before Phoe came out and covered him with a blanket. They both stared at the grave, her eyes so red, one can tell she cried tell she had no tears left. They both walked back to Azure's cottage, where Phoe went to prepare some tea.
Azure and Phoe sat there for a moment until they both said at the very same time: "I am sorry." They both gave a small chuckle, sitting there and staring at the fire. "I wont claim, I understand it", Phoe said. "But I love you always. and we all miss you. Please tell me, why you cant stay, why you have to leave." Azure looked at her and went to tell her everything that had happened, from the day he made landfall. When he was done, it was late into the night and the rain had stopped. Phoe looked at him in shock and in understanding. "Dad, why do you help that girl? Do you love her? What about Mom? I thought you cared for her and me. Plus, she is only a few years older than me." She kept asking one question after another, until Azure stopped her. "I will always care for your Mom, but I hurt her so bad, that there was no way repairing it, as far as i can tell. And it's hard to explain how and why it happened, that I started to care for Amelia." Azure continued to explain it to her, "But when you get older, one day, you may understand it." Phoe turned away from him "I don't think, I ever will Dad, I dont know if I can accept the fact you left us for her." Azure went to reach for her but she shrugged his hand off her arm "I just don't get it." as she walked out the door.
A few more days had past and Phoe and Azure had talked some more but mainly about this boy, she was taking on hunts and fishing. Before they noticed, time had flew by. Azure had said his goodbyes but Phoe was no where to be found. He sighed and made his way to the ship. When he arrived to town, he saw Phoe waiting for him. Azure smiled, as he saw her and she returned the smile with one of her own. She ran over and gave him a big hug. "I will try to understand all of this. Mom said, we will figure out a way to make it work. But this Amelia, I don't trust, nor do I like her. Maybe I will give her one opportunity to prove me wrong. But if she hurts you or keeps you away from me, she will get a fireball to her face." Phoe gives a wicked smirk, before waving him off as the ship left the port and drifted off into the distance.
Sam sighed, setting the note down on the table. She knew the day would come, but she wasn’t sure she was ready. She stood, intending to slip on her boots and go find Aleyah. But when she turned back to grab the note, it was already in Phoe’s hands.
“Phoe…”
The girl didn’t respond. She simply tossed the parchment into the fire and ran out the door. Sam tried to follow, but her knees reminded her that her age and weight were not ideal for running, so she settled for the aid of her lungs.
“Phoe!” when the girl ignored her, she looked around and spotted Aleyah working in the garden. “Aleyah! Stop her… your brother has returned.”
Much to her dismay, the younger woman smirked, wiping her hands on her apron to follow at a leisurely pace. Sam closed her eyes, quietly asking the Gods if they were trying to kill her. She hurried to the gate, looking up the hill just in time to see the fireball. Aleyah caught her arm as she started down the road.
“Leave them. Trust me.” Her smirk faded for a moment. “She needs this, and he deserves it.”
“Someone is going to get hurt!” Sam gasped as she watched her daughter pull a dagger.
“No they won’t.” Aleyah shook her head. “He won’t hurt her, and he’s skilled enough to make sure she doesn’t kill him.”
“Do you not love me?!?” Phoe’s words made the women fall silent as they echoed down the hill.
Sam’s heart shattered as she watched Azure pull their daughter into his arms, still fighting. Slowly, she saw the girl lose the fire of anger, and give into the grief. She started down the road again, just as Phoe retreated. Aleyah quietly pulled her back through the gate to the garden and made her sit on a bench. It seemed like hours before Phoe appeared, looking so broken that Sam leapt from the bench to embrace her.
They stood in the garden like that for what somehow felt like both an eternity and a brief second. The girl’s shaking shoulders were the only indication that she cried, but her mother held her tightly, murmuring softly against her hair. When Phoe finally pulled away, she kept her eyes down, mumbling something about her room before running towards the house.
Sam wiped her own eyes, watching the dogs hurry to keep up with their girl. Once the last of them had disappeared inside the house, she moved to the bucket Aleyah had been using to water the garden. She splashed some water on her face, smoothed her dress, and headed towards the gate.
The walk was short, it always had been. This time though, that worked against her. She stood at the door a moment, unsure what she wanted to say to him. Finally, she worked up the courage to knock.
“Little Dragon?”
Sam lowered her eyes, so she wouldn’t see the disappointment on his face when he opened it to find her. After an awkward greeting, he invited her in. She sighed, no sense beating around the bush.
“I warned you that she might react poorly.”
At least he didn’t bring the girl, she thought. She pushed the conjured images from her mind as she tried to explain their daughter’s pain to him. She wasn’t quite sure she’d gotten through when she left him, but she had tried. The house was quiet when she returned, so she settled into her favorite chair to stare blankly at a book until dinner.
Phoe spent the next few days refusing to discuss the situation. She tried to go about her days as though nothing had changed. She ate breakfast with her mother, grabbed some food for lunch, and left for the day. Sam caught glimpses of her working at her parents’ home, and heading out to hunt, but the girl evaded conversation like a thief running from a guard. So, when she heard Phoe cry out for her one night, she ran like the house was on fire.
Rounding the corner, she saw the girl crouched in front of the fire in the sitting room. The pups whined and cried, nudging at the much older dog lying on the floor. Sam crouched beside the girl, ignoring the protest of her knees.
“He hasn’t eaten or drank all day.” Phoe sobbed. “And now he won’t get up, he just lays here.”
Aleyah appeared in the door, looking confused, followed a few minutes later by Sam’s parents.
“We heard shouting.” Her mother moved to join them by the dog. “What’s the matter with Bruce?”
As her father helped move the old dog to make him more comfortable, Sam’s mother tried to coax him into drinking something. In all the commotion, it took Sam a moment to realize Phoe was gone. Aleyah caught her eye and mouthed “Azure”. When the large man loomed in her doorway, the rest of the family moved to allow him in.
Sam could not hold back the tears as she watched the father and daughter say their goodbyes to their best friend. The dog had been Azure’s, and Sam had been leery of him at first. Azure insisted though. Bruce would offer protection when he could not be there. There was no way either of them could have anticipated how quickly that day would come. Over the years, she had come to love the dog, but she knew she would never fully understand their bond with him.
Later that night, she’d stood at the window, unable to sleep. She pulled her shawl tighter around her shoulders, watching Azure as he buried Bruce and then just sat there. Torn between going to comfort him, and wondering if that was even her place anymore, she sighed. Just when she’d decided she could at least heat some cider or tea for him, she saw a shadow moving across the yard. When the figure draped a blanket over his shoulders, she caught a glimpse of Phoe’s face. Watching them felt like an intrusion, so Sam moved to sit on the end of her bed and say a prayer of thanks that Azure had been here for this moment.
She wasn’t sure how much time had passed when she heard the door creak open. Phoe silently moved to sit on the bed beside her. Sam simply wrapped her arms around her child, and let her cry. Very little sleep was had that night, so she was grateful to find a warm breakfast on the table when she entered the empty kitchen. She was almost certain she caught a glimpse of Aleyah walking past the window, but was too tired to go investigate.
Phoe opened the kitchen door and let the pups out, leaving it ajar while she came to sit at the table. After a few minutes of poking at her food, she cast a quick glance at her mother.
“Do you know about Amelia?” she looked like she had just dropped a Gynk fire on the table, and was waiting for the explosion.
“I do.” Sam set her fork down, folding her hands in her lap. “I actually met her briefly. She seems like a nice woman.”
“You mean girl.” Phoe scowled.
“Phoenix. I know she is a bit young.”
“A bit young! She could be your daughter, Mama!” Phoe’s face flushed.
“Phoe.” Sam reached for her hand. “I don’t quite understand it either. But she appears to make him happy.”
“And what about us?” Phoe pulled away. “Doesn’t our happiness mean anything? We’re his family!”
“You are his family, dear.” Sam smiled sadly. “My feelings and opinions do not matter. All I care about is you.”
“Bullsh-“
“Phoenix Ava Lynch!” Sam raised a hand to silence her. “You are allowed to feel angry, but I will not have it sounding like a harbor tavern in my kitchen. I have educated you well enough to know that you have a bigger vocabulary than that.”
Phoe’s shoulders slumped and she ran a hand through her hair.
“What are we going to do, Mama?”
“The same thing we’ve been doing since he left. We live our lives.” Sam took Phoe’s hand, giving it a gentle squeeze. “We have been doing just fine, haven’t we? And we can look into visiting Galmair soon.”
“I don’t want to go to Galmair.” Phoe pulled away, standing. She called over her shoulder as she walked away. “He knows where to find us.”
Sam sighed, hearing the bedroom door slam closed. Suddenly without an appetite, she moved back to her own room to get dressed. The woman that she saw in the mirror was a stranger. The little lines that had formed at the corners of her eyes were foreign to her, and was that a bit of white in her hair? She’d noticed the red had faded to a lighter shade the past few years, but this was something different. Time had snuck up on her when she wasn’t looking.
She studied the woman as she combed out her hair. Had you asked her twenty years ago where she saw herself, this would have been the last place she’d imagine. Phoe was nearly grown. Wouldn’t be long and she would be finding someone to start her own family with. Aleyah might do the same. Her parents were on the losing side of time as well. And where did that leave her?
Alone.
Not truly, she knew. Phoe planned to stay. To raise her family in the house that Sam herself had been raised in. But things don’t always go to plan, do they? She had planned to stay in Galmair. Maybe give Phoe a sibling or two. Grow old with her husband… but Nargun had smiled, and now she was here.
No changing it now. She thought. And Phoe may still end up with some siblings, after all, Amelia is certainly young enough to desire and provide children. Turning away from her reflection to pull a gray dress from the wardrobe, she decided that it didn’t really matter anymore. She had Phoe, and that was enough to make her happy with the life she’d led. That had to be enough.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“I should like to invite your father to dinner for the remainder of his visit.” Phoe’s head snapped up, eyes narrowed as her grandmother spoke. “Lunch too. He is only here a short time, and there is no reason he should be eating his meals alone, when his family is here.”
Sam took a cautious peek at all of the faces there. Aleyah kept her head down, focused on the carrots she chopped. Sam’s parents continued kneading the bread as if they were only discussing the weather. Phoenix stood there, knife halfway through a potato, staring at her grandmother as if a dragon had just landed on her head. When her eyes met Sam’s, Sam simply looked back to the meat she was slicing.
“That is a lovely idea, Mama.” Sam heard the startled gasp from her daughter, but continued. “He is still your father, Phoenix. And your Aunt’s brother. Surely you can withstand sitting at a table, eating and making polite conversation with us for a few days. Especially not knowing when you may see him next.”
Sam looked up, meeting her daughter’s eyes. They stared for a moment, jaws set firmly, each waiting for the other to concede. Finally, a hint of understanding, then sadness flickered in Phoe’s gaze. The girl nodded once, then silently went back to her potatoes. The tension of the room was eased when Sam’s father began to sing an old sea shanty that always made his wife roll her eyes, and everyone else giggle.
“You were never a sailor, Samuel.” The elder woman chided.
“Ah, but I longed to be.” Samuel replied, eyes sparkling with amusement. “Until I met this beautiful young woman. She had eyes like the sea, and I could not bear the thought of leaving her for months at a time. And with a name like Marina… it was a sign from the Gods.”
Sam watched her mother blush like a schoolgirl, before stealing a chaste kiss from her father. This is what she had hoped for when she’d wed. She knew it had not always been a fairy tale. The years spent struggling to have a child, the two they lost before her, and the one after. She’d heard her mother cry many nights over her failure to give him a proper family, she hadn’t even given him a son. And she’d heard her father’s gentle reply that she’d given him the best family a man could ask for. Their story was not perfect, but their love certainly was.
Phoe rolled her eyes as Samuel hummed another tune, pulling Marina from her work to dance with him, but Sam caught her sneaking glances and smiling softly. Even if her own marriage had failed, at least she’d still been able to provide Phoe with a decent example of what one should look like.
The remainder of Azure’s visit seemed to fly by. Once he began eating meals with the family, Phoe seemed to calm a bit. She made polite conversation with him at the table, and Sam was fairly certain she saw the girl head towards her father’s house a few times between. So, Sam was rather surprised to find Phoe gone on the day he was set to leave town.
“She snuck out while you were dressing.” Aleyah nodded towards the gate. “Headed to town I think. Don’t worry. I am sure she’ll get her goodbye in…. but don’t tell him that.”
It was strange saying goodbye to Azure this time. There was a finality to it that she had not felt in years. Sam was not sure when, or if, she would see him again. Phoe was old enough, she could likely travel to see him on her own, or even with Aleyah. If they were able and willing to go to him, what cause should he have to return here?
Looking at him now, as he glanced around in the hopes Phoe would appear, there were so many things she wished they had discussed. Their focus had been on Phoe for his entire visit, so they had never really sat down and decided how this would all work. She didn’t even know how she was supposed to say goodbye to her ex-husband. Should she hug him? Shake his hand? Just wave and tell him to have a nice life?
Something in the way he hesitated when he finally turned to her implied he was having similar thoughts. Time was no longer on their side though, so she handed him a basket of food for the journey. With a smile and an awkward pat on the arm, she wished him safe travels. They would figure it out eventually. She stood at the gate, watching as he disappeared over the hill. As he walked out of view, she felt a door close somewhere inside her.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Some weeks later, Sam found herself baking a pie, and waiting for whatever thought was troubling Phoe to make its way out of her mouth. The girl was perched on a stool, worrying her bottom lip between her teeth, and studying Sam with a frown. The idle tapping of her foot was the only sound in the room for what felt like hours.
“Mama? Are you going to start dating again?” she finally blurted out. “Now that Dad isn’t here to scare men away.”
“Scare them?” Sam laughed, shaking her head. “Dear girl, there was no one for your father to scare. And he wouldn’t do that.”
“Not intentionally. But would you call on a woman whose giant, scarred ex-husband was at her house all the time to help with their child?” Phoe wrinkled her nose. “Dad looks pretty mean.”
“He can, sometimes, I suppose.” Sam grinned, wiping her hands on a towel. “But you needn’t worry, dear. I have no intention of trying to find a man. I am far too old for that silliness.”
“But, won’t you get lonely?” Phoe tilted her head. “What about when I’m grown? Who will keep you company?”
“If I am that desperate for companionship, I’ll get another dog. I have no plans to find you a step-father.” Sam chuckled. “You don’t need a romantic partner to be complete, Phoe. I haven’t had one since you were still nursing, and I promise you, I am content with things as they are. When you are grown and carving your place in the world, I will still be content. I might miss you, but that is something that cannot be fixed with a man.”
Phoe nodded, still frowning a bit until Sam ruffled her hair.
“If you are wanting to play matchmaker, your Aunt Aleyah is much younger.” Sam grinned. “And I think I know someone who might be just perfect for her…”
Aleyah walked through the door at that moment, hands on her hips until the two redheads laughed. They spent the rest of the evening baking and talking while playfully tossing ingredients at each other. By the time they were done, the kitchen looked like a war zone. It was unanimously decided that it could wait until morning, and the girls all headed off to bed.
“Mama?” Sam paused at her door, looking back at Phoe. “We’re gonna be just fine.”
“We are, sweetheart.” Sam smiled. “We certainly are.”
))