Now Under New Management!
Sssari wants everyone to know key features of newly opened tavern.
- Drinks! Many kinds of drinks, all brewed by master brewer Borgate!
- Warm fire! It warm! Me checked!
- Chairs! They for sitting! Or standing on...or dancing on, or taking nap in.
Sssari no care! - Tables! They for putting foods and drinks and stuffs on! Same rules as chairs apply!
- Bar to much for person? Sit outside! It like inside, but not!
- FISH! FISH! FISH! Cooked to order!
- Rooms for rent! See below!
Now part everyone been waiting for!
ROOMS!
Okies, theres two rooms for rent, both very nice, and very available!
Rates go like this:
25 sliver to be payed to Sssari each dwarven week.
See? That not so bad.
Oh! And if person looses key, they have to pay 150 copper! So don't do it!
If person wish to make offer for room, please send birdy with note to Sssari, or just leave letter at door or something, me no care.
Or better! Find Sssari in person!
And if person can no afford room, still go see basement, it damp and cold and dark and scary, for if, you know, person like that kinda stuff.
Sssari no judging. Sssari no like that.
Other Stuff!
Sssari just like to say how much he excited to be running tavern, but also...
Sssari like tips! Peoples that give Sssari tips be very good people indeed!
...Borgate like them too.
Chairs around fireplace is kissing area, you want to kiss, you go sit there! Sssari means it!
Tavern meant to be family friendly!
Sssari no liable for injuries that happen while staying in tavern.
No shouting at Sssari!
No throwing things at Sssari!
No trying to hit Sssari with sharp objects and stuff!
Ask Sssari about his flute! No really! Ask him!
And finally, have good time at tavern!
All comments, complaints, questions, offers, threats, ideas, suggestions, compliments, grievances, favors, secrets, tips, recipes, treasure maps, poems, riddles, love letters, problems, and tavern theme songs are to be sent to either Mr. Sssari Trisska, or the reigning town government of Troll's Bane.
~Thank you.
*Near the bottom is a hastily scrawled note, in red ink, in till a white ink suddenly takes over, written in a calmer and more elegant print.*
Arrrr! Who does he think he is? Damn lizard! Makin' him off to be better then me, Borgate, the same dwarf thats been runnin' this bar for gods' knows how long! Well I'll tell ye, hesa fool, a miserable snake-tongued cretin who's just about has the same chance of handin' ye a drink as he is to spill it all over yer tunic! Clumsy mate, I swear...Now listen close, don't even waste yer time with 'em, just see good old Borgate for all ye business, give me ye coin, and I assure ye won't have to deal with the slimy bastard Sssari Who's Borgate's bestest friend in the whole wide world! See? Borgate make funny joke! It just game me play with Sssari, since we such good friends! He so nice, and everybody like him and stuff, and is most not clumsy lizard ever seen! Sssari greatest boss on island! There no reason Sssari should not handle ALL business!
*The final signature seems to have been forced, as if a certain lizard had his claws about the dwarf's hands.*
-Borgate