Illarion.org

Posted: **Thu Dec 01, 2011 6:48 pm**

it wasn't >_>

Posted: **Thu Dec 01, 2011 9:31 pm**

Athian wrote:Daddy issues...

sincerely
Athian

Athian is pure gold when it comes to humor

Posted: **Wed Dec 07, 2011 2:49 am**

Orcs wrote:S:Grimm'Khul: KRAZZAK!
Krazzak Urazg: Grimm! Has been so long!
Grimm'Khul throws his hands up in the air,
Grimm'Khul - like he just don't care.
Krazzak Urazg: ...

Posted: **Wed Dec 07, 2011 3:15 am**

Tirrend wrote:I'm sorry, Jimmy. I really AM a king and I didn't mean any of those things about NOT being a king. Come worship me and I will rule over you with my dragon slaying kingliness!

Posted: **Sun Feb 05, 2012 8:55 pm**

Darik Axtschwinger wrote:
In the name of the King this shall be the judgement in the case Robert against Murgo, Criea and Jag:

After hearing all witnesses and collecting all bribe, I announce the following judgement:
Because of annoyance of the pigs and the pignoses as well as reference to the High Court of Silverbrand with a bagatelle, Robert is sentenced to one evening of mug-cleaning in the Fluffy Sheep Tavern under supervision of Borgate.

Tialdin

Awesome! Made me laugh.

Posted: **Mon Feb 06, 2012 12:00 pm**

Rincewind wrote:Dear Robert Regard.

The Clan of Dar'krest sends its lovely greetings. Appalled we had to watch you stumble and hit the door twice with your eye. Then triping again and drop down the stairs wich made you fall unconscious. My general did his best to help you, unfortunatly he isn't a medico. Therefore I'm very sorry for any wrong treatment you may have obtained while he tried to help you. Well, we are very glad you are healthy again. For any residual injuries wes wish you to get well soon.

Made me laugh as well

Posted: **Fri Feb 17, 2012 10:57 am**

Stefan and Fredric are talking about a certain lass giving sexual favors to Sorgan, then implicated a few others....this is one of them, i got a good laugh.

Sorgan Stonemate: Arrr!
Fredric Drake: Oh shut it.
Fredric Drake grumbles toward the smithy
Fredric Drake rubs his eyes with his good hand and looks skyward
w:(600712059)'Stefan': Slug might be givin' him favours too... *grumbles quietly*
Fredric Drake: Ahhhh!!!!
(600712059)'Stefan': You heard how enthused he was when you mentioned tusts!
Fredric Drake squeezes his eyes shut, holding his hand over them "All tha hair....AN tusks!"
(600712059)'Stefan': Guess it's where goblins come from..?
Sorgan Stonemate: Arrr!
Fredric Drake looks to the smith for comfirmation
Fredric Drake: UggghHh!!!
Fredric Drake: Meh eyes!!!
(600712059)'Stefan' bursts into laughter, leaning forwards in his chiar.

Posted: **Sun Feb 26, 2012 8:57 am**

Oxiana! It was short, but it was sweet. Thanks

Ha..

Posted: **Sun Feb 26, 2012 9:02 am**

blank

Posted: **Mon Feb 27, 2012 3:36 pm**

Miriam wrote:You've played too much Illarion ...
...
- when you know english vocabulary like "entrails" and your english teacher tells you not to play so many ego-shooter games.
...

Posted: **Mon Feb 27, 2012 10:03 pm**

Lia tied for fun Idrandal and then bound him firmly to a chair. He threatened jokingly that he can bite,So Lia wanted to put an apple in his mouth.
Then, he said.:

'Idrandal': Heeeey, no bondage with male elves!
'Idrandal': That is Dji's thing

some minutes later...Idrandal is still confined to a chair

Valandil: Oh, just put a mug of beer in front of him with a small hole and he is forced to watch the beer dropping slowly on the floor
Liasany laughs
Liasany: Sounds good
Valandil grins evil
'Idrandal' gives a worried but amused look to Valandril *you are evil... I like that*
Katharina: we could also put a cake next to the beer
Liasany: hm have we beer here?
Valandil: I haven't got a beer for month now
'Idrandal': And a naked elvess stripping?
Katharina: I never drank a beer
Valandil: Djironnyma stripping
Valandil grins
'Idrandal': EEEEEEWWWWW
'Idrandal': the pain! the pain!
Katharina: He's really evil..
Valandil: I know
'Idrandal': He is!
Valandil grins

Posted: **Tue Apr 10, 2012 9:35 am**

PurpleMonkeys wrote:Jefferson, Zehshirr, Caldarion. All short, but all good.

... ha! Slut!

Posted: **Fri Apr 13, 2012 3:45 am**

Kyre chuckles then nods "but it must not be much if you forgot?" then points her finger making a portal "should we go to trolls bane?" saying as almost an afterthought "Will what is a contraceptive?"
Kyre: [anc] Trolls Bane
Kyre starts with a mystical formula.
Kyre: [anc] JUS FHEN ANTH KEL
William Erundas: [anc] I will stay here and continue my studies a bit more. A contraceptive? Something that help couples from different races to have children with each other.
William Erundas smirks "And couples with the same gender."

Posted: **Fri Apr 27, 2012 11:16 pm**

A bit long... but one of the funniest RPs I've had in a while.

Tall Man strolls along, rubbing the back of his head.
Tall Man: Leetle woman.
Anne Roy: Wha ye want?
Tall Man: You are....not clean.
'Mark Strongarm?' smirks listening to the two in the corner, trying not to laugh
Tall Man: Koloman will... help leetle woman bathe.
Anne Roy: Ye touch meh..
Anne Roy: Ah hurt yeh.
'Velisai' watches the tall man with a slightly devilish grin.
Tall Man looks thoughtful for a moment.
'Koloman': Koloman is gentle.
Anne Roy: Ah. Will. Hurt. Yeh.
'Koloman': And Koloman is.. charming.
Anne Roy glares at the man.
'Koloman' is a very large, muscular man, his eyes seem a little dull, and he doesn't look like the sharpest knife in the drawer, he has shaved brown hair and a thick beard, his eyes are green.
Anne Roy: Screw off.
'Evie' rolls her eyes listening to Koloman
'Mark Strongarm?' looks to Velisai unable to surpress a rather large grin
Anne Roy is a thickset young woman in full battle armor. She has dark eyes, skin marked with various scars. She is shaved bald.
'Koloman': Koloman thinks leetle woman is....pretty.
'Koloman': But... Koloman thinks leetle woman would be like...leetle stones.
'Mark Strongarm?' laughs and chokes it off terribly
Anne Roy: ...
Anne Roy's face turns red.
Anne Roy stands.
Anne Roy: Walk aweh. Now. Er ah will hurt yeh.
'Mark Strongarm?' crosses one leg over the other and puts his arm across the back of the chair, watching the two, looking entertained now.
'Koloman': If....
'Koloman': Koloman walks away...Koloman will break Koloman's heart.
Anne Roy: It'll heal.
Anne Roy: Sod off.
'Koloman': Is leetle woman sure? Koloman is gentle.
'Koloman': Koloman is charming.
Anne Roy: ..do ah seem ta care bout gentle er charming?
Anne Roy: Ah aint nah two bit whore. Sod off.
'Koloman': Mabye leetle woman needs chaming gentle Koloman.
'Mark Strongarm?' mumbles something about 'kolomon consistantly refers to himself in the third person..'
Anne Roy: No.
'Koloman' looks very thoughtful for a few moments.
'Koloman': .....
'Koloman': .......Yes.
'Mark Strongarm?': Koloman needs to take a hint..
Anne Roy crosses her arms.
Anne Roy: Yeh got ah count of three.
'Koloman' looks at her for a moment.
Anne Roy: Afore ah hurt ye.
''Koloman' rubs his chin some.
Anne Roy: One.

...

'Koloman': Koloman has large penis.

Posted: **Sun May 06, 2012 6:51 am**

Leon Demelii takes a bite of the ham however.
Tirrend: Leon!!
Tirrend: That was the ham of doom!
Leon Demelii: Oh yes.
Tirrend: It was a weapon of untold powers..
Leon Demelii throws it in Evie's direction.
Leon Demelii: Ahhhhh!
Tirrend: There you go.
Leon Demelii: It's raining hame.
Leon Demelii: hams*
Evie ~the ham hits her in the head and knocks her out of her chair~
Tirrend: Bullseye, bitch!

Posted: **Tue May 15, 2012 3:00 am**

Rak'Liff takes his sword out and swings recklessly, still holding his head with one hand
(1213513197)'Foe' returns blows with the shovel.
Rak'Liff: Damn oomies!
(1213513197)'Foe''s eyes seem to be closed as he aimlessly flails.
(1213513197)'Foe' stumbles back and falls to the ground.
Rak'Liff holds his head.
(1213513197)'Foe' hits the ground with a grunt.
Rak'Liff: For dah love of demons!
Rak'Liff: Meh head!
(1213513197)'Foe': Nargun! Why!
Rak'Liff: Meh 'ough piss on joo!
Rak'Liff begins to whip "it" out and walking over to the man
(1213513197)'Foe' gasps and tries to scarmble to his feet.
Rak'Liff laughs as he begins to pee.
(1213513197)'Foe' stands too late and gets urinated on.
(1213513197)'Foe' looks angry, but then he holds up a finger, eyes lighting up.
Rak'Liff puts it away and laughs, pointing at the human.
(1213513197)'Foe': You should.. you should fart at the stoopid oomie!
(1213513197)'Foe' pulls out a bottle and uncorks it as he speaks.
(1213513197)'Foe': I must acquire wind!!!
Rak'Liff: Joo behave oomie. Meh not want tah teach joo dis lesson again.
Rak'Liff: Wind?
(1213513197)'Foe': Wind!
Rak'Liff: Wubba?
(1213513197)'Foe': For my quest! Orc wind will do!
Rak'Liff scratches his head and seems to think about this.
(1213513197)'Foe' holds out the bottle.
(1213513197)'Foe': You know, a mage will be openingit.
(1213513197)'Foe': I bet it'll kill him.
Rak'Liff takes the bottle and holds him behind him.
Rak'Liff: Yubba. Dis 'ough tah do jus dat
Rak'Liff makes a strange face and brings the bottle forward to close it quickly.
(1213513197)'Foe' holds his nose with one hand, holding out the other to take the bottle
Rak'Liff: Bettah go change dere oomie.

Some people just know how to RP the worst of the worst

Such a funny time! But fair warning, this is my orc's signature move, instead of a ghosting you get peed on. What up!

Posted: **Tue May 15, 2012 5:52 am**

~ Did i just find a copyright infringment?

"For dah love of demons!"

You son of a bitch!!!!

Disclaimer: Providing your mother is in good standing and health and not deceased or ill which in turn would make my comments null and void with my most humble apologies....

Posted: **Fri May 18, 2012 7:17 pm**

Das passiert wenn man nen "#me" mit anderen Befehlen verwechselt! xD

Posted: **Thu May 24, 2012 7:25 am**

Koloman had just drank a soup he made from a bone he'd taken from a red skeleton warrior and an herb, along with halfer meat and some vegetables. Just too funny. Went on for a long time.... This was just around the beginning when his throat and face was burned:

Evie: the druids have a paste.. but given its your throat and mouth and internally... i dont believe numbin the areas is safe
(930194779)'Koloman': Oh Ah An i Ih in i le!
Uhuru smiles softly at Koloman
Evie smiles listening but clearly not understanding
Oxiana: One must be able to make a soothing tea or something.
Evie: Cal?
(930194779)'Koloman' climbs up to his feet, and looks around.
Uhuru: Nothing too hot.
Evie: Vel just left for an appointment...
Evie: i dont know much of herbs
Caldarion: At this point I'd recommend rum
Uhuru: Pefect!
Evie nods
w:Uhuru: Lovely idea.
Evie: let me get him a bottle
Caldarion: smoking is not good...
Evie: and soup.. tepid.. not hot
Caldarion: if no rum is available, the mead...
w:Uhuru: good numbing qualities in rum.
Caldarion: the honey in mead works as antidote too
(930194779)'Koloman' grabs his stomach, then winces a little.
Evie: Koloman?
Evie offers him a small red bottle
Oxiana: Is he even going to keep anything down?
Evie: not for a day or so
(930194779)'Koloman' belches audibly, a small flame comes out of his mouth.
Evie: after that its going to ...
Uhuru looks surprised
Caldarion raises a brow
Evie stops talking
(930194779)'Koloman': I ah.
Evie: he does NOT need alchol
Uhuru: That's not good
Evie tucks the rum back in her bag

Posted: **Sun May 27, 2012 1:17 am**

Kugar wrote:I'de like to add, that wither you agree with me or not, this game is not even a fraction of what it used to be. I would be uncomfortable to use the word "dying", but this game, no, this "world" is falling defeat at the hands of those who know nothing about it. So, if you are reading this, common player, you can wander around and chat by camp fires and kill red skeletons until your skills go yellow - you have no idea what illarion is and can be, and if you do, you are doing it a disservice with every click. This game , this "world", was built upon passion and story-telling. Well, and if you cannot accept that, or think I am talking a load of bull, then good luck to you. And good luck to the future of Illarion!

I'm trying, Kugar, i'm trying.

Posted: **Tue May 29, 2012 5:07 pm**

Face wrote:Let's face it..

Posted: **Tue Jun 05, 2012 8:40 am**

((Tirrend had just snuck up behind Era, who was holding her son Liam. Precocious little thing, isn't he?

))

'Tirrend': Boo.
Eraisuithiel Celebrindal jumps.
'Oxi': Liam, get him!
Eraisuithiel Celebrindal: Oi!
'Tirrend': Greebas, oomins.
'Tirrend' grins.
Eraisuithiel Celebrindal grabs Liam as he tries to leap over her shoulder with a growl.
'Oxi': Are you sure I can't give him something sharp?
Eraisuithiel Celebrindal chuckles, shaking her head.
'Tirrend': What in the blazes is that miniature demon?!
Eraisuithiel Celebrindal: He is dangerous enough on his own.
'Tirrend' cowers from the child.
Eraisuithiel Celebrindal: That would be mine and Fredric's son... Liam Drake.
'Tirrend': Oh gods, not another Fred.
Eraisuithiel Celebrindal// the boy growls, dark blue eyes narrowed at the man.
Eraisuithiel Celebrindal: Aye, just like his Da.
'Tirrend': Why is the world cruel, Oxi?
'Oxi': It just is Tirri, sorry.

Posted: **Thu Jun 07, 2012 4:50 am**

Leon Demelii wrote:So to make clear, I'm not a female from florida looking for a good time Sorry PO Roscoe......

Posted: **Thu Jun 07, 2012 10:21 pm**

PurpleMonkeys wrote:
Leon Demelii wrote:So to make clear, I'm not a female from florida looking for a good time Sorry PO Roscoe......

Pfft.

As if i was the only one who got their hopes up...

Posted: **Tue Jun 12, 2012 5:41 am**

on the news...

100yr old plus turtles breaking up .. difference sited is they just cant stand each other anymore.. female has even biten a chunk out of the males shell..

roflmao

Posted: **Fri Jun 15, 2012 12:59 am**

Drathe Blue: I thought it was you *he smiles, catching sight of Kae then, it hardens.*
Roscoe Arrowtree: ((o.O))
Frau: ((His smile... His smile!))
Roscoe Arrowtree: ((Oh. I knew that...))

Posted: **Sun Jun 24, 2012 7:53 pm**

'Tirrend': I did that to a white goblin fish once.

Posted: **Mon Jun 25, 2012 11:41 am**

Gotta love IRC:

<Jeisa> And you're just sitting there like, "Get it OUT already."

And

<AlexanderKnight> Too many Martins
<Jeisa> Oh, are they both named Martin?
<AlexanderKnight> So is morfox and nitram
<Nitram> Skamato is named Martin
<Nitram> martin is named Martin
<AlexanderKnight> Babe.... spell nitram backwards
<Nitram> i'm named Martin
<Jeisa> Holy crap.

Classics

Posted: **Sun Jul 01, 2012 4:07 am**

"and so you shall be saved upon the eve of destructin by the whim of the almighty" Athicus 14:30 - Athian

And so it was, and for a time, it was good.

Posted: **Mon Jul 02, 2012 9:17 pm**

Norodaj hunter: Hm. You have something I can use? I can't exactly /shout/ them to death.

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